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Jackie Astier’s Textured Home in Elle Decor

I’ve been busily (obsessively) taping little scraps of patterns all over the walls, feeling good about some things, horrified by others, and generally overwhelmed by the sheer variety of stuff out in the world. Probably this process was easier when Sears Roebuck offered your choice of three patterns, to be delivered by train or pony. Instead I find myself squinting into a crystal ball, wondering which of said 800 million patterns will be least offensive to me in a decade. Compounding the problem is Better Half Ben’s insistent, rather querulous complaint that all my choices are so “decorative.” That’s gauche, dude. And kind of obvious.

All this is to say that I had an interesting reaction to stylist and socialite Jackie Astier’s home featured in this month’s ED.

jackie astier elle decor

jackie astier elle decor

It’s all moody broody texture — not much in the pattern department. Now part of me finds this cozy and fabulous, and part of me thinks I’m just backsliding into my safety net. Haven’t I already been here before? Maybe. But lacquered walls and tonal faux bois wallpaper feel so soft and dreamy.

jackie astier elle decor

Oh, and grasscloth. Delicious delicious grasscloth.

jackie astier elle decor

This bedroom is too girly for me, but I think the color palette feels a little more avant garde than the gray gray grays used elsewhere.

jackie astier

jackie astier elle decor

It’s a lot of eye candy, but I also feel like I’ve seen so much of it before. Damien Hirst: check. Mastercraft brass: check. Beni Ourain: check. Milo Baughman Karl Springer Paul Evans: check. Kind of veers into furniture museum territory.

Still, I think she does a lovely job making the space feel more intimate. I’ve been hard at work trying to create layers with pattern, but maybe in some cases texture is the way to go.

What do you think? Are you all about pattern or texture?

[Elle Decor, Jackie Astier]

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Hello, Mellow

Hey dudes, I’m still here. Sorry I haven’t had much time to hang out in blogland lately, but guess what? Ike is sick. Again. This makes the fourth time in three months and I’m about ready to send him back to the baby factory for repairs and new parts. I kid. Really. Please don’t jump my ass, trolls. Anyway I am busy and tired and covered in snot and all this awesomeness gives me the pissies when I hear that color and FUN!!! are coming back to decor. Thanks a lot, Sara Ruffin Costello — you are obviously too perky to have sick children.

So, how much do I sound like Grouchy Smurf when I say that I hate color and I hate fun? I don’t really, but ok, right now I do. I hate them. In case you couldn’t already tell, sleep deprivation and living in a miasma of snot and toddler germs will do weird things to you. Well, it does weird things to me, anyway.

You know what takes me to my happy place? This.

Gary Hutton

Isabel Lopez Quesada

Joel Mozersky

Ryan Korban via Lonny

Kelly Wearstler

Ahhh. Blood pressure. slowly. falling. Tirade ending. Rage receding. Patience returning. Likey Smurf emerging.

Neutrals sometimes get a bad rap because of that whole 80s band aid beige epidemic, but just look how soothing yet interesting they can be when mixed with a country ton of texture. Fur rugs? Check. Muted patterns? Check. Shiny shiny goodness? Check. Acres of psychedelic mushroom marble? Check.

I need it all. It’s for my health. Do you think Blue Cross covers decor?

Also, special announcemento: The lovely Elizabethi Hablinski McDougall of the aptly named design firm EHM Design will be here on Thursday to wax dramatic about her very own house woes. Plus as a special added bonus, she will gift you with some very pretty pictures of other people’s houses that are not in the least woeful. So be here. Or else.

You kind and generous people wouldn’t want me to get all hatery again… would you?

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