Hello, darling readers of Design Crisis! Your hair looks fantastic today.
For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Tula and I’m usually turning tricks on a blog called WHORANGE. Like many of you, I rely heavily upon my daily Design Crisis fix to get me out of bed and through the day. Therefore, when Erin and Karly asked me to be a guest blogger, I felt like
an addict being given the keys to the crack house Miss America – honored, delighted, and ready to embark upon a glamour-filled journey.
But, before I launch into the talent portion of the competition, I would like to acknowledge the little fellow who made my debut today possible — Erin’s newborn son. Welcome to this world, handsome guy. You’ve got yourself a tremendously talented, witty, and inspiring mom who is admired both internationally and intergalactically. And that Karly lady she hangs around with ain’t too bad either.
That being said, let’s sparkle, shall we?
Today’s inspiration comes to us from a ditty made famous by my hero — Judy Garland. Judy was a troubled gal with a million dollar voice and Hollywood at her fingertips. In other words…she’s just like us. Please sing along if you know the lyrics.
Somewhere over the…
Yep, you got it.
Rainbow Reproduction. Making rainbows is an arduous task and one that unicorns do not take lightly. The combination of carnal chemistry and heavenly lighting is key and extremely rare, but the result is pure magic. Chris Bishop’s educational “Afternoon Delight” is the perfect way to say “I love you” and dispel the myth that rainbows are born of raindrops and sunshine.
Rainbow Kicks. With the long trek ahead of us, let’s pick out some sensible shoes, shall we? Salvatore Ferragamo’s colorful collection ranges from practical platforms to fancy flats. Since comfort is key, I’ll slip on the platforms.
Rainbow Rockers. As we all know, rainbows and rock stars go together like whiskey and rehab. Jason Munn of The Small Stakes takes a page from the psychedelic 60s and spins it modern with his vibrant screen prints. Is anybody else getting the munchies?
Rainbow Cravings. Remember, you are what you eat. Therefore, eat pretty. (Macarons by Paulette.)
Rainbow Poop. And, poop pretty.
Please, take your time. No rush. I’ll just be in the next room reading my favorite novel…
Rainbow Wisdom: If only I could remember what color it was. A wise person once said, “Color-sorting your bookshelf may look pretty as a pony, but it’s as practical as a Pinto.”
That wise person was me. Could have sworn that book was leopard print. Maybe I’ll find it in here…
Rainbow reading. The Kid’s Republic Library in Beijing stocks picture books from all over the world and provides plenty of technicolor hideaways and colorful corridors for tiny readers. However, something tells me the library doesn’t supply these…
Rainbow Rings. Kiddie coloring meets fabulous finger fashion with Timothy Liles crayon rings. Speaking of art…
Rainbow Room. Designer extraordinaire Gio Ponti knew how to craft a colorful crib and even created the design magazine Domus, which ran from 1928-1999, to show us how. (Thanks for the tip, Mr. Peacock!)
Rainbow Respite. These Ferragamos are killing me, people. One moment please as I rest on this bench.
Rainbow Relaxation. Speaking of rest, I took a trip to Yosemite over the 4th of July and it looked nothing like this. Perhaps I should go back in the Fall. (Illustrations by Scott Hansen.)
Okay, I’m back on my feet. Let’s hustle…
Rainbow Enlightenment. Did you know that if you close your eyes and envision two unicorns humping, a rainbow will shoot from your third eye? It’s true!
Go ahead and try it. I’ll wait. (Illustration by Brandi Strickland.)
Rainbow Misfire. But, keep your third eye trajectory away from the cats!
We’ve finally made it — the end of the rainbow! Thank you for taking this journey with me, lovely denizens of Design Crisis. Sorry, there isn’t a pot of gold, field of green, or pocket gnome for you to take home. Sadly, all that’s here is the cold, hard reality of what happens when you indulge too much in a good thing.
Stay pretty, darlings!