Fauxest

Last time I was in Albuquerque I drove past a lawn that was landscaped entirely in fake plants.  As in: little plastic indoor-sized plants and flowers stuck in the dirt with no rocks or grass (real or fake) in sight.  It was easily the most hideous yard I ever done did see and thinking of it still sends shivers down my spine.  While working overtime to maintain control of my gag reflex I begged the universe at large to please keep such monstrosities out of my sight.  The universe challenged my resolve by presenting me with this:

A bedroom designed by Marjorie Skouras.  I struggled, I fought, I really really wanted to hate it, but, well, aside from the real flowers, I pretty much love it.  It’s ridiculous, totally impractical, and those greens are gross together but I can’t help but revel in the fantasy of waking up there every morning.  What’s a fake branch in the eye every now and then if the trade off is the opportunity to live in an unliving, unbreathing fauxest (fake + forest, huzzah!)

This got my wheels turning so I decided to web sleuth more rooms with fake wilderness.  I have to admit, I didn’t find much – go figure – but I was very picky.  The trees (trees only) had to be HUGE and no wallpaper murals allowed.  3D only thankyouverymuch.

HG&P interiors tempted my tummy with this lovely, albeit temporary, event installation with monolithic trees

Here’s another view incase one wasn’t enough to satisfy your “wedding party I could have had” fantasies. 

Unfortunately, this is the only other example I was able to find.  Here’s hoping (fingers crossed extra hard) that the trees in TWBA’s offices are fake.  If not, I’m going to let the mossy abstractions on the walls count.  Plus, that grassy shag rug really drives the fauxest vision home.  Let’s take another look:

Klein Dytham Architecture converted an old bowling alley into what might be the only office I’d ever be willing to work in.  Ok, it’s good, but not that good.