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Category: miscellaneous

That Time I Auditioned For an HGTV Show

Sorry for the light (to no) posting, but things be crazy up in here. As you may have oh so cannily surmised from my title, I’ve been a little busy doing things I swore I would never do. Things like trying out for a reality show that involves competing for money on national freaking tv. I must have huffed too much lacquer remover because that’s just nuts… right?

So, here’s the scoop — I spent a week of my life shooting self portraits and portfolio pictures and filling out MASSIVE ridiculous mountains of paperwork so that I could attend a local HGTV casting call for a house flipping show. Hilarious/not hilarious side story: I was almost done laying out 15 pages of said paperwork drama on a program I don’t normally use when I left for literally five seconds and turned around to find Luke standing at my computer, playing it like a piano… 15 pages totally jacked up. Hahahaha kids are so cute. Sort of.

Anyway, head shots happened:

hgtv headshots

What? I didn’t tell you that it’s a team challenge? The plot thickens. So if we get on the show we have to renovate an entire house with no subcontractors. By ourselves. All of it. This is Matt, he’s Karly’s husband and he’s a contractor. So basically my plan for world domination involves me bossing Matt around while he lays acres of teeny tiny tile in a herringbone pattern all over the walls, floors, stove… anything that will move. I can’t wait for him to read this news!

instagram hgtv

So Matt and I head to the casting at a hotel with terrible carpet. I’m not very good at selfies or apparently even at the ubiquitous instagram foot shot, because it looks like I have cankles and there’s a big ugly scab with a flashing filtered arrow pointing towards it. But check out that fugly carpet! I have photo priorities.

In between nitpicking the delightful decor we’re just sitting there, assessing our competitors. It seems like virtually everyone but me has spent more than five minutes on their (very large) hair and makeup, and I bet nobody else got puked on that morning after arm wrestling a 13 month old all night for four hours of sleep. Other businessy people are setting up installations for clients. We are playing (and winning) iphone physics quiz. Did I mention priorities?

To make a long story short, we waited three hours for a three minute interview. We did our silly dog and pony show, and then we went home.

And got called back.

Fast forward to a couple of days later, when I still have not slept or ironed the tired wrinkles off my face. We are then subjected to an hour long interview under lights and camera with a pair of adorably adorable ladies. I’m pretty sure I aced that shit — just being honest (I hope). I mean I could always always always do better but I think I interview well thanks to years of teaching and many more years spent talk talk talking at my husband. Meanwhile I have no idea what Matt said because they split us up and interviewed separately for a while… like at a police station. Hopefully he didn’t mention the dead bodies.

So that’s what’s been happening. We should know in October if we will be famous and stuff. Wish us luck!

On another tv front, Little Miss Amy Hadley and her fancy YNN crew (or maybe just Jesse the camera dude) came over Tuesday to film another House Proud segment on rugs. My favorite!!!

austin interior designer

I really wanted to take pictures of our house all blissfully clean and styled up, but I only had 2.2 spare seconds to shoot so this is what you get.

Can you say giant amazing lucite coffee table? Can you say it five times really fast?

Now say, Erin you’re not too old to be on tv. Because apparently I have gone from shrinking violet to total fame whore. Soon I will assuredly become insufferable and direct all inquiries to my publicist, so please leave a comment now while you can.

You dudes rule.

 

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In Which I Humiliate Myself, AKA Video of My Nursery Tour on House Proud

You know how sometimes you see pictures of yourself, or hear recordings of your voice, or — you know — see yourself on tv, and wonder how the pod people managed to take over while you were sleeping?

You know?

ABSOLUTELY!

I suspect my parents will be confused when they discover I have transitioned from born and raised in east Texas to Jessica from Sweet Valley High (don’t judge). Or maybe I always sound like that?! Either way, I need some elocution lessons.

Thankfully Luke is adorable and precious and pretty much steals the show. Plus Amy Hadley is utterly charming! If you live in Austin the segment will be airing on YNN today.

Enjoy the video and try not to hurl tomatoes at your screen.

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Hot News

Wow. Summer is really slapping down my blogging mojo. I just can’t bring myself to recount the long days spent wiping baby butts, fighting toddler tantrums and wilting in the triple digit heat, even though I know you’re dying for every glamorous detail.

But I guess I do have, oh… a few little things going on. Things like this:

amy hadley ynn

If you squint your eyes you can see that’s my living room with YNN tv anchor Amy Hadley standing smack dab in the middle of it. That’s because she’s running a new home and garden television series called House Proud and our humble home is going to be featured.

Baller!

The promo started running on Time Warner Austin last Saturday, and Amy and her crew will be coming back next week to tape segments in the teal room and Luke’s nursery.

And to interview me.

I would be cold sweat chills cramps nervous all day and night if Amy weren’t so laid back and adorable. Just look at that cute face:

ynn tv decorating

I know, I know. It’s blurry. I have a master’s degree in photography but I can’t seem to take a single clear picture with my freaking camera phone.

#FAIL

That hashtag says I was totally pressured into joining Instagram, so you can catch the breaking news in all its blurry glory right here.

I’m planning to blog more behind the scenes action as it unfolds, and perhaps between now and then I will learn something about photography. Taking pictures without a screaming kicking baby in my arms should help.

Don’t worry, you will hear a lot more about my newfound fame and fortune. Probably you will hate me before the show even airs.

Some non sequitur housekeeping:

Pinterest has eaten all the pictures from a year’s worth of previous posts and I can’t figure out how to restore them… I can’t even figure out what the pictures were to begin with. It’s really awesome. I’m slowly re uploading broken links, but in the meantime I do apologize for the ugly old posts.

Also, I am revamping the back end of the blog and you may find that my permalinks have changed or that stuff has disappeared or that generally Design Crisis is heading down the slippery slope of neglect and ruin.

Rest assured everything will be shiny and newly ergonomic very soon. Or at least soonish.

And finally, I have gone a little berserk in the shopping department.

italian modern marbleKeep checking back for updates. Sooner or later these kids have to nap so I can blog, right?

Right?

Later, taters. Don’t forget to slather on the sunscreen.

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Some Things That Have Been Happening: A Crappy Phone Picture Story

Hi guys. I started writing another monster post on buying rugs but then I got overwhelmed and more than a little worried I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about. When I began studying maps of the Middle East and researching the major rug weaving cities of Iran I realized I may have bitten off more than I could chew right now. I’m just a little OCD like that. I’ll get around to it soonish but I need to let things incubate for a while. In the meantime, I highly recommend this article on buying rugs.

Also, I am super busy because my kids have succumbed to cold #857 this year. Both are encrusted with all manner of viscous fluids and it’s a full time job keeping that bizness off my new rug.

It’s much prettier (darker and less contrasty) in person but I’m already stressing about how overwhelming it is in its new space. I foresee a major rug and furniture rearranging party on the horizon.

 Lest you think me a heartless bastard who only cares about my furnishings, here are my cute little people. It’s good that they are cute because they destroy everything I own.

Which is why my fabulous Jenny Andrews Anderson painting is still safely rolled up and not actually lying about on the floor like this. I can’t wait to get it stretched and hung over my fireplace because it is HUGE and I love it.

Speaking of art, I’m selling this large (4 ft) 70s abstract painting. Austinites, email me if you’re interested.

Still speaking of art, I’m slightly obsessed with this amazing gouache painting I didn’t buy. Why didn’t I buy this? Oh yeah — because I already spent all my fun money on art and rugs.

Strict budgeting is largely sponsored by the impending (soon? I hope?) kitchen redo we’re saving for. I’ve been to see Sanders for paint help and I think I’ve narrowed the cabinet colors down to three choices. We shall discuss this ad nauseum later, but for now just know that babies love Sanders.

erin williamson

Last but not least, I got new business cards! Bryan Keplesky designed the logos and Karly Hand designed the cards. I think they’re kind of President of the Illuminati awesome.

Publicly launching ones photography and decorating career at the end of a series of crappy phone pictures is undoubtedly a smooth move. Please do see my photo site here and my latest house tours here and here if you’re interested in hiring me to work for you.

You know where to find me.

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Landslide!

Wow… I didn’t expect the Blue vote to be so unanimous! Seems you guys feel the best is yet to come for the nursery. However, Mazey is pretty surprised the race wasn’t tighter and isn’t quite ready to concede the election. Meanwhile Frenchie doesn’t give a shit because he just wants to smoke some pot and marry another Frenchie.

What? I’m only talking bout rugs, y’all.

Seriously, thanks for voting. For everything. For important stuff.

 Please keep me on your reader because I have lots of updates to share, including the new rug in situ (which will it be?!), and a MEGA CRAZY purchase that could be fabulous but might be 100% fail… Also I have gone on a pillow binge that shows no signs of stopping.

Oh yes I did.

And finally the hall wallpaper should be up soon…

Hooray me! Obviously I am the winnah here.

Later, taters. It was so awesome to hang out again!!!

See you soon.

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