Ok guys and gals, I have two major decisions to make today. This would be doable, except that I am a used up, burned, crispy charred piece of toast. This weekend we cleaned, hauled trash, painted, and moved Ike into his big boy room. I woke up at 2am feeling like I had done a speedball — all hot and anxious and confused about where I was. This morning is not faring much better, and that is why I desperately need your help. Let’s get to it.

Decision #1: Buy a Damn Table Already

I am driving the poor sales rep at the furniture store crazy with my waffling, so I’m determined to order something today. Ok, but do I get a marble tulip table, a white painted tulip table, or a walnut tulip table?

Marble tulip cons:

Most expensive. Unknown quality — the table I’m getting will not be carrara, but some other unknown white marble with less veining (no pictures are available because the marble varies so much). Fragility — how does a giant elliptical piece of marble stay balanced on a small pedestal without breaking???! Staining — am I going to wish I had chosen something easier to maintain? Redundancy — I hope to get marble counters someday and I’m concerned about marble overload.

Pros:

IT’S MARBLE. Is marble overload even possible? I seriously lust after this table.

White painted table cons:

Diminished sex appeal — it’s basically white painted veneer. Unknown quality — no pictures of finished product available. Durability — will it chip and gouge out to reveal veneer underneath? Cleanability — can I scrub the crap out of this without abusing the finish? Length of ship time — it’ll probably take three months to get this table into my hot little hands… gross.

Pros:

Inexpensive (relatively). It’s plain white, so it’ll go with anything. Easier to move. Not concerned about breaking it.

Wood veneer cons:

Wood is bossy — rosewood or walnut will limit my chair options in a major way. Durability — this is veneer so will it gouge out? Not refinishable (veneer). It may clash with my (to be installed in the future) white oak floors.

Pros:

Relatively inexpensive. Available soon. Lighter than marble. Will not limit my counter choices.

Ok, which table should I buy?

Decision #2: Maybe Buy a Cheap Rug While They’re On Sale Today

West Elm has 15% off rugs today. I have sample for this denim and jute rug, and it’s cute but maybe a little juvenile with my coral/pink walls?

Look at me, I made a mockup. Shocking.

They also have plain jute flatwoven rugs. I’m looking at the fourth one down — the flax color. This is kind of boring, but it would allow me to do some fun seating upholstery. No mockup. Sorry, I got tired.

Meanwhile, Overstock is also having a sale. I like this two tone herringbone jute rug, but I’m concerned about staining. Is jute easy care, or is that only seagrass? I know sisal is the worst.

Finally, I could just not buy a rug. I would be missing out a bit on the sales, but perhaps I’m trying to make too many decisions at once…

Who, me?

Opinions? Concerns for my mental health?

I have to go to the doc in a few to do my third trimester blood sugar test… even though I haven’t gained much weight so far, I’m worried that my steady diet of donuts is about to backfire. Anyway, I may not be able to respond to your comments but I will be reading them while people stick needles in me and examine my hoohah.

It’s a good day all around.

Yesterday we thanked The Rev for such a beauteous day off, and then we hit the San Marcos outlets in search of treasure. Because shopping is about cultivating peace and understanding, right? If we hadn’t actually found something worthy of the trip, I would be depressed that I live such a miserable and shallow existence. On the other hand, have you seen what was happening with our tv situation?

RAGE. ANGER.

Also, WOW I really need to take some new pics of the house. But I am lazy and Ike is home sick, so no pictures today.

I suck.

Anyhow, this is what we bought to disguise our components and “blend in” with the wall. Say hello to the West Elm Niche buffet. It usually retails for $699, but we got it for $199 because it had a few tiny chips here and there. High five.

While I kept holding out for some amazing antique to come my way, it actually fits the space fairly well. And it was cheap, so when Better Half Ben figures out how to hide the components by running cable through 2x4s and bricks (probably never), I won’t feel bad about abandoning ship.

Now I just need to figure out how to style this sucker.

I shamelessly stole this image from Naomi of Design Manifest‘s pinterest, which is a total douche move because she was probably planning to post it tomorrow but I need it NOW.

To put myself back in Naomi’s good graces (fingers crossed), I’m showing her Ikea Rast hacks that she used as a tv credenza. Crafty as all get out. I’m thinking I should paint the hardware on the Niche gold, and then steal the shelf idea. Because I am a thief.

I find Celerie Kemble‘s tv set up both charming and hilarious. Should I just put a giant vase full of flowers in front of the tv, cross my fingers, and pray no one notices it’s there? Awesome.

And then there’s fabulous Laura Day. No matter how many times I post this picture, it’s never enough. My take away from this image is to make sure I tune the tv to 2001 or A Clockwork Orange before I photograph it in situ. Oh, and to buy an amazing Ello mirrored credenza, stat.

File that one under #thingsthatwillneverhappen.

Now, if you will excuse me, I have some Downton Abbey to watch. Later, taters.

It’s that time of year, y’all — the time of year when the whole world slows down to a snail’s pace and everyone is on siesta time. That’s because (at least in our neck of the woods) it’s over 100 degrees outside and even walking out to the car forces a stinky sweat. I know you’re too hot to contemplate big fancy posts about the design world and stupid trends blah blah blah, so instead I’m going to tell you about all the window shopping I’ve been doing from the comfort of my air conditioned home.

I really want this dumb craigslist headboard so I can just be done with the neverending no headboard drama, but these stupid bitches won’t write me back. If it’s not available, delete the post, people! Anyway, I’m still pretending they are going to let me pick up this king sized, gold leafed, wood carved goodness. For $100 no less.

Then I will pair it with my new white duvet and these cutie pie tie dyed sheets from Overstock. I love so many of the colors, but I’m pretty sure only ivory, rose or black, would look good with my stuff/paint color. Guess which one I’m going to pick? $36 bam!

Moving on from the bedroom, it’s time to replace our milk and cereal bar encrusted rug (thanks, Ike!).

I could buy the exact same leather braided rug we already have ($150 here), or I could shake things up… maybe like this.

Of course, who knows exactly what “this” is, since the picture is so craptacular? You’re killing me, craigslisters. Anyway, if I buy a totally different rug, then I will need… other totally different stuff. You know how it goes.

I’ve been eying Ikea’s Hovas sofa for a while now… it’s so cheap! But it’s white, and I explained what happened to the rug, right? But it’s slipcovered! But will I ever wash said slipcover? Hmmmm. Has anyone ever sat on this sucker? What do we think about it?

Speaking of Ikea, they reissued the wildly popular Vago patio chairs (thanks to Modfrugal for the tip!), and I’m dying for a set, but our store doesn’t stock them. I think you should all call your local congressman to complain.

And since I apparently only like black and white things (did you figure out which color sheets I want yet?), I’m thinking about running over to our local West Elm and picking up these blackened planters on sale. Or maybe I will just save myself some sweat and order them. I’m so environmentally aware.

Ok, maybe not, but I am aware that I’m lazy.

Stay cool, homies!

Bang, bang, Baroque is dead. There’s a new sheriff in town, and his name is Euclid. Along with Deputy Pythagoras, Sheriff Euclid is here to promote order — no blurry lines for this straight edged law man. Still, Euclid ain’t afraid to loosen up and get all scalene in the hizzy. So bust out your protractors and compasses, and don’t forget to bring your perpendicular polygons. Kids, we’re gonna wax axiomatic today.

Softly rounded biomorphic ribbon chairs by Pierre Paulin are the perfect foil to hard angles. via Karl Anderson.

Hot shiny circumference supported by sexy supplementary angles = featherweight heavy hitter. Geo Side Table by West Elm, $199.

Kelly Wearstler knows a thing or two about balancing solid forms. I love this idea. Going to tell The Hunny to bust out his whittling knife and get busy.

Who wants a piece of the Pi? Just don’t forget to square the radius, or you may end up with a wimpy circumference. via Ngoc Minh Ngo

These wee Hexpods would be fab dangling from fishline, forming a constellation of acute angled beauty. I would paint them gold and silver and hang them in front of a black wall. Small Hexpod is $9.95 from CB2.

Hexagons and rhombuses, unite! via Ruy Teixeria

Chad Hagen’s Nonsensical Infographic No. 1 may not prove any corollaries, but it does demonstrate how beautiful spatial relationships can be. Prints available through 20×200.

No funny stuff, just crushing on these rectangles. I want this painting bad. via Ngoc Minh Ngo.

Apparently the home owner never leaves his house. I wouldn’t either if I had a pool flanked by these mirrored isosceles megaliths. via OWI

I’m considering this rug for my redesigned living room. It’s probably too busy, but think of how much cat hair it would hide. Ikea Stockholm Rug, $229.

Wouldn’t it be awesome if just one window in your house had beevision? You have to appreciate how orderly those little captains of industry are. via Ruy Teixeira.

Balance. Mathematical perfection can come from a paint can. via Christoph Theurer

Boho Geo Fringe Pillow courtesy of Urban Outfitters, $38. Love it.

This is quite possibly the coolest bathroom I have ever seen. Something tells me I can’t get those cabinets from Ikea, but that’s not going to stop me from lusting after their trapezoidal beauty. via Christoph Theurer

That’s it for today’s roundup. Hopefully you were all able to follow along, and are prepared to take a pop quiz. Questions: What do you think of this new trend? Do you mourn the absence of curlicues? Could geo peacefully coexisit with flowery damask?

First of all, I want to say THANKS to everyone for your great comments and advice regarding my crazy dining room. Imagine me pasting a big, sticky gold star on your foreheads. I got tons of great ideas, and I’m already mentally rearranging the room 20x over. Now, if I only had a billion dollar budget to match… Since I don’t, I’ll be carefully watching Craigslist and Ebay, and crossing my fingers that the upcoming Round Top antiques fair will exceed my wildest treasure hunting expectations. In the meantime, I thought I’d throw out a few ideas I cooked up based on your comments. You can always refer back to my dining room pics here to check my mental handiwork. So, I’ve already pulled all the crap off the window wall, and I’m considering hanging these West Elm curtains wide on either side of the window to add some depth to that space.

I’m thinking I would still keep the gold roman shade… crazy?

In my fantasy (but still vaguely achievable) dining room, this vintage chandelier would take center stage:

It will probably end up being too expensive, but I’m hoping I can snag it, anyway.

And then there’s the table issue. For now, I’m planning to keep the white chairs and use a different pair of Danishy chairs to flank the window (have I mentioned I’m a huge chair whore?). They are similar to the ones I currently have in the dining room, but better suited for the space if the table is removed. As for the table itself, I have a zillion pics bookmarked as inspiration. Mind if I share?

So, I’m kind of crushing on trestle tables right now; I feel like something with minimal legs would work well with the white chairs, and I also like how the table ends are uncluttered by chairs. And something rustic-ish (but not too yee haw) would disguise spaghetti stains. Via Met Home.

A more refined version via Domino. Boy those chairs look familiar…

I like a good plinth table, too. This one is kind of reminiscent of Art Deco pieces, but all moderned up. Via Living Etc.

A similar table paired with a very schizophrenic chair collection. Via Living Etc.

This floating, nearly legless table is the bees knees. I love the length, the lack of chairs at the ends, and the airiness. But what the hell is up with that picture collection and the creepy sprinkler system? Via Met Home.

Or maybe I should go oval, but with a simpler pedestal fitting? I like round tables, but they won’t fit my space. Love the blonde wood with the dark paint. Via Living Etc.

Same table, different finish. I really need to be able to fit six chairs at my table, though since I like to have my buds come over and entertain me. Karly’s getting good at shutting the baby up. Via Living Etc.

I really just want this table. And those chairs. And look — bish has ANOTHER dining table in the back room! Surely she can spare a set. Via Domino.

And then there’s this beauty. Do you think crumbs would get wedged in the cracks? Not sure that I care. She is magnificent, and I’m sharpening my ax already. I’ve got plenty of trees. Via Living Etc.

So that’s all I’ve got for now, but tune in after Karly and I hit Round Top in a couple of weeks to see if we made out like bandits. Who knows? I may redecorate my entire house. Or I may be under house arrest after leaving baby Ike with the Hunny for a whole day.

Ah, the sweet beat of BAR-GAIN, SA-VINGS, DIS-COUNT — yes those words are music to my (admittedly tone deaf) ears. Call me DJ Tightwad. Hence the glamor of 1stDibs and all of its amazing tables, rhapsodized about in my last post, is a little marred by its very extravagance. So, for all you fellow cheapskates out there, I present a day of Dibsian diamonds at cubic zirconian prices, so you can keep your bling and not go blung.

Diagram 1:

People, I made graphics to illustrate the awesomeness of bargain shopping. I even did some math and stuff so I could compare apples to apples for you, my dearest readers. So it’s easy to see that $350 for a pair of tables from CB2 is, oh, I don’t know, a slightly better deal than $3500 for almost the exact same ones from 1stDibs. Let’s calculate, shall we?

Budget Check: $3500 – $350 = $3150 worth of white V-neck American Apparel tee shirts for every day (and club-filled night) of the year. Those things are expensive, right?

Diagram 2:

Now Edward Wormley was an awesome designer and those tables are no doubt solid rosewood, but I’d be perfectly happy with these classic knockoffs tables at Home Decorators which are inspired by the originals, and are oh so sensibly priced. But if you’re a true tightwad, you’ll go for the stunningly cheap version from Ikea for only $12.99. It even comes in red.

Budget Check: $4000 – $280 = $3720 worth of spinner rims for your fly Toyota Prius.

Diagram 3:

Warren Platner is one of my all-time favorite designers, but until someone starts paying me to write for this blog, I’ll have to stick to the similarly awesome Tornado tables from CB2, which were pretty inexpensive to begin with, but now that they’re on sale they are downright thriftacular! I almost feel like it’s my duty to buy them, like I must for the good of bargain hunters everywhere, but I will admit that I’d spend a few extra dollars on oversized glass tops to give these babies some extra presence.

Budget Check: $3400 – $160 = $3240 worth of Stunna Shades. I wear my sunglasses at night.

Diagram 4:

The Deal Hunter blogged about tubular steel tables some time ago, and while I’m not totally convinced on their awesomeness, Overstock really does a great job of magnetically attracting my credit card number with their low prices, spectacularly FREE shipping (there’s always a coupon online to knock the nominal $2.95 charge off your total), and rockin’ customer service. No, this is not an infomercial, I really do heart Overstock. Too much.

Budget Check: $1800 – $130 = $1670 worth of high top neon Nike Dunks. If only Overstock sold those, too.

Diagram 5:

The ubiquitous Saarinen tables, featured in just about every contemporary decor magazine. Actually they’re feeling pretty overused, but hey, I’ve got one (not an original!), so who am I to prevent you from getting one, too? Here’s how to get your own: Pier One. Fo’ realz. Spray paint that baby white and you’re good to go. Of course there are so many different versions out there; CB2 sells one for even less, but I don’t care for the legs on that one. Whatever — you can cruise their site and decide for yourself.

Budget Check: $1100 – $129 = $971 worth of Kanye West itunes. Disseminate Stronger to the entire world, yo!

Diagram 6:

Ok, to get the original tables’ look, this requires a little DIY action, but stay with me… you can do it! So the 1stDibs tables have marble tops and the lovely but plain West Elm versions do not. Why not grout and tile the tops of the less expensive versions? A mosaic would be interesting. Or you could wedge a cool piece of artwork — like an abstract mod screenprint — between a piece of glass and the tabletop. Can you dig it?

Budget Check: $2200 – $320 = $1880 worth of subwoofers. Try not to blow the glass off your new tables!

Diagram A Million:

Yeah, this one might take some vision, but I’m sure you can see the very large “FOURTEEN THOUSAND” in the picture above. Who are these people kidding? Driftwood, pine cones, seashells and white paint? Check, check, check and check, thanks in large part to Twiggie.org. After you finish your handiwork, you can laugh all the way to the bank.

Budget Check: $14,000 – $400 = enough to throw your friends a huge party, and maybe enough to book Prince as the headliner. Isn’t fiscal responsibility fun?