Ok guys and gals, I have two major decisions to make today. This would be doable, except that I am a used up, burned, crispy charred piece of toast. This weekend we cleaned, hauled trash, painted, and moved Ike into his big boy room. I woke up at 2am feeling like I had done a speedball — all hot and anxious and confused about where I was. This morning is not faring much better, and that is why I desperately need your help. Let’s get to it.

Decision #1: Buy a Damn Table Already

I am driving the poor sales rep at the furniture store crazy with my waffling, so I’m determined to order something today. Ok, but do I get a marble tulip table, a white painted tulip table, or a walnut tulip table?

Marble tulip cons:

Most expensive. Unknown quality — the table I’m getting will not be carrara, but some other unknown white marble with less veining (no pictures are available because the marble varies so much). Fragility — how does a giant elliptical piece of marble stay balanced on a small pedestal without breaking???! Staining — am I going to wish I had chosen something easier to maintain? Redundancy — I hope to get marble counters someday and I’m concerned about marble overload.

Pros:

IT’S MARBLE. Is marble overload even possible? I seriously lust after this table.

White painted table cons:

Diminished sex appeal — it’s basically white painted veneer. Unknown quality — no pictures of finished product available. Durability — will it chip and gouge out to reveal veneer underneath? Cleanability — can I scrub the crap out of this without abusing the finish? Length of ship time — it’ll probably take three months to get this table into my hot little hands… gross.

Pros:

Inexpensive (relatively). It’s plain white, so it’ll go with anything. Easier to move. Not concerned about breaking it.

Wood veneer cons:

Wood is bossy — rosewood or walnut will limit my chair options in a major way. Durability — this is veneer so will it gouge out? Not refinishable (veneer). It may clash with my (to be installed in the future) white oak floors.

Pros:

Relatively inexpensive. Available soon. Lighter than marble. Will not limit my counter choices.

Ok, which table should I buy?

Decision #2: Maybe Buy a Cheap Rug While They’re On Sale Today

West Elm has 15% off rugs today. I have sample for this denim and jute rug, and it’s cute but maybe a little juvenile with my coral/pink walls?

Look at me, I made a mockup. Shocking.

They also have plain jute flatwoven rugs. I’m looking at the fourth one down — the flax color. This is kind of boring, but it would allow me to do some fun seating upholstery. No mockup. Sorry, I got tired.

Meanwhile, Overstock is also having a sale. I like this two tone herringbone jute rug, but I’m concerned about staining. Is jute easy care, or is that only seagrass? I know sisal is the worst.

Finally, I could just not buy a rug. I would be missing out a bit on the sales, but perhaps I’m trying to make too many decisions at once…

Who, me?

Opinions? Concerns for my mental health?

I have to go to the doc in a few to do my third trimester blood sugar test… even though I haven’t gained much weight so far, I’m worried that my steady diet of donuts is about to backfire. Anyway, I may not be able to respond to your comments but I will be reading them while people stick needles in me and examine my hoohah.

It’s a good day all around.

It’s that time of year, y’all — the time of year when the whole world slows down to a snail’s pace and everyone is on siesta time. That’s because (at least in our neck of the woods) it’s over 100 degrees outside and even walking out to the car forces a stinky sweat. I know you’re too hot to contemplate big fancy posts about the design world and stupid trends blah blah blah, so instead I’m going to tell you about all the window shopping I’ve been doing from the comfort of my air conditioned home.

I really want this dumb craigslist headboard so I can just be done with the neverending no headboard drama, but these stupid bitches won’t write me back. If it’s not available, delete the post, people! Anyway, I’m still pretending they are going to let me pick up this king sized, gold leafed, wood carved goodness. For $100 no less.

Then I will pair it with my new white duvet and these cutie pie tie dyed sheets from Overstock. I love so many of the colors, but I’m pretty sure only ivory, rose or black, would look good with my stuff/paint color. Guess which one I’m going to pick? $36 bam!

Moving on from the bedroom, it’s time to replace our milk and cereal bar encrusted rug (thanks, Ike!).

I could buy the exact same leather braided rug we already have ($150 here), or I could shake things up… maybe like this.

Of course, who knows exactly what “this” is, since the picture is so craptacular? You’re killing me, craigslisters. Anyway, if I buy a totally different rug, then I will need… other totally different stuff. You know how it goes.

I’ve been eying Ikea’s Hovas sofa for a while now… it’s so cheap! But it’s white, and I explained what happened to the rug, right? But it’s slipcovered! But will I ever wash said slipcover? Hmmmm. Has anyone ever sat on this sucker? What do we think about it?

Speaking of Ikea, they reissued the wildly popular Vago patio chairs (thanks to Modfrugal for the tip!), and I’m dying for a set, but our store doesn’t stock them. I think you should all call your local congressman to complain.

And since I apparently only like black and white things (did you figure out which color sheets I want yet?), I’m thinking about running over to our local West Elm and picking up these blackened planters on sale. Or maybe I will just save myself some sweat and order them. I’m so environmentally aware.

Ok, maybe not, but I am aware that I’m lazy.

Stay cool, homies!

Yesterday I made the grueling trek into the northern wilds, home of Ikea. Land of milk and honey. Or so I thought. See, I have long been incubating radical plans to radically update our completely unradical bedroom — our bedroom that is now headboardless, directionless, and a complete mess (if you don’t have kids, judge not lest you be immediately impregnated).

Before I headed to Ikea and was completely destroyed by the juggernaut that is ubiquitous Swedish decor, my plans to revolutionize sleeping through the power of psychedelic design were maybe somehow inspired by these rooms:

Minus the barfy dress.

Minus the funny face.

As I stood in front of the racks and racks and racks of duvet covers (while Ike melted down t-10 seconds to naptime), I thought about how I’m supposed to buy a blanket instead of a duvet cover, because duvet covers are so fall 2010. But all I saw were duvet covers. About 5237866 of them. And I know I probably should have gone home and bought a blanket off the interwebs, but I was under pressure from fluorescent lighting and toddler tantrums. Plus I’m tired of looking at the stupid mauge comforter (suspiciously close to this color) on our giant bed. So there I stood — endlessly, painfully pondering the duvet cover conundrum.

First I picked this up:

And then I put it down, because it had flowery flowers on it and I suspected it would not play well with the giant black panther picture hanging beside our bed. Or the Oriental nightstands. Or the chrome bench. Or pretty much anything in that room.

I bought a white duvet cover. It’s not even worth picturing. It’s white.

How did my technicolor dreams turn to dust in the wind? Damn you, Ikea, for overwhelming me with your conspicuous overstocking. Whatever. I’m moving on, and I think things are headed in this direction:

Just kidding. It’s pretty, but I have too much stuff to live in here.

I have a new plan. It has elements of crazy, but also supports the new white duvet cover theory formula corollary.

Alas, we’ll have to discuss it ad infinitum later because I have to go to a biggo photo job right now… someone has to pay for all that crap I bought at Ikea.

Have a good Monday. Do some psycho shopping for me.

[Desire to Inspire, Elle Decor, Magnus Marding]

WOMAN, MAN AND BABY HELD HOSTAGE BY BAD PARKING AND OVERWHELMING SELECTION AT OUTLET MALL

This weekend, a tragic confluence of heat, hunger and exhaustion, struck a local family while attempting to shop at a San Marcos outlet mall on Sunday. Apparently, they were unaware that shopping at the Tanger Outlet on a weekend could be incredibly hazardous to their health. When asked what had prompted such a dangerous excursion, they cited this deal, purchased by a friend at the Crate and Barrel outlet:

Although Central Texas is devoid of CB2 stores, the Crate and Barrel outlet does carry a number of returned CB2 pieces, including the Uno sectional which said friend purchased for significantly less than half price. After learning of her friend’s purchase, the unidentified woman enticed her family to head south in search of this sofa:

The woman stated that she felt the possibility of encountering a CB2 Piazza sofa was worth the trip, and hoped to find a returned model for purchase at a lower price. In fact, there was a Piazza sofa at the Crate and Barrel outlet, but it seems the woman was upset to find that it looked nothing like the pictures in the magazine:

She said, “This is not the luxe, Euro styled sofa I have obsessed over for months! This is a lumpy piece of [curses] that looks and feels like a cheap, unfolded futon.”

When asked if there were any redeeming factors to her otherwise foolhardy trip, she said, “Have you been to the Pottery Barn/Williams Sonoma/West Elm outlet? It’s really really really big.”

It appears that the Pottery Barn outlet carries a significant amount of home furnishings at a discount, but the woman did complain about the prices and quality. “The West Elm pieces were chipped and disfigured, the Pottery Barn couches looked stodgy and old, and the Williams Sonoma furniture is priced for the rich and famous. I mean, who would pay $2500 for a desk at an outlet mall?” She also indicated that there may be some contentious issues of taste:

She said, “Holy [curses]! Look at all that coral! Coral, I tell you! And LOBSTER PILLOWS!” [Emphasis added]

When asked how she survived such a treacherous trip fraught with heat, expensive yet tasteless furnishings, and angry family members, she replied, “Well, there was a guy who gave us a free beer. He said I looked really thirsty. Oh, and I bought a waffle maker. Waffles and beer! They pretty much saved the day.”

Thankfully the situation seems to have been resolved peacefully and without any long term ill effects. Updates will be posted as we receive more details.

We have reached the unfortunate time in the Austin weather cycle where local residents have 2 choices: retreat indoors or crowd into Barton Springs. Our 2 weeks of spring have ended and it’s officially hot here. Bleck. But hope springs high in the form of this weekends first ever Renegade Craft Fair hosted, ahem, indoors

After years of shows across the country, renegade craft has finally made it’s way south to austin and is bringing 200 + indie crafters with it. I know that indie crafter often means a booth full of crochet rock koozies, but Renegade is a juried show which helps to leave the hand felted ipod replica makers at home where they belong. Or so I’ve heard. Don’t believe me? Come see for yourself

Even yours truly will be there selling screen prints. I’ll be splitting a booth with my fellow craft mafia members, which is basically an excuse for me to get the hell out of my backyard demo and catch up on some much needed gossip.

The craft fair is this saturday and sunday from 11 am – 7pm at the palmer events center. Hope to see you there.

Oh, PS, speaking of prints, I only have THREE HORSEYS LEFT in the whole world. Buy the last ones never to be printed again here.

I like Craigslist. A lot. Ok, this much:

See there? That’s my bookmarking system, and its wee arteries are clogged with cheap lamps and tables that I cannot possibly squeeze into my home. So I’m just going to go ahead and toss a few gems your way. If you live near Austin, wheeeee! Enjoy some bargains. But first I have some gifts for those of you who live elsewhere — I’m going to call this selection of junque the Craigslist Razzies. Because this kind of crap annoys the hell out of me.

Gosh, who am I kidding? I am just dying to own this golden console overrun by chubby cherubs, complete with a matching cherub studded silver mirror. Apparently the artist also designed Pope John Paul II’s throne. Wow! Bonus! And it’s only $4000.

I am something of a spelling nazi, so when I see “rod iron” I want to smash an anvil through my computer screen, because it’s wrought iron, people. WROUGHT, as in forged. Also, wtf is a “mirrow?” Only through context have I gleaned that it somehow means mirror to a scarily high percentage of people out there. But “provintial” is a whole new trainwreck.

Sigh. This has been posted for months and months and months. Maybe it’s because that fabric + that chair = utterly and completely wrong. I feel bad about dissing it because I know that someone actually put effort into this project, but then I feel angry that such a lovely chair was maimed beyond recognition. It kind of makes me want to claw my eyes out.

Ok, this person has highly questionable taste in sofas, which is FINE. Sometimes I like to listen to Moby. We all have our flaws. But when you advertise your fugly crap like it is the shiznit for months on end, and never ever lower the price, well then you, sir, suck. No one is ever ever going to buy that pea green poo for $800, so don’t act like you’re doing someone a favor by being “willing to part with it, to a good home.” I’m sorry, I meant to say: let me just hustle on down to your house so I can submit my application!

Speaking of people who are batshit insane, let me just give you a little background on this sofa — Crate and Barrel’s Petrie. It’s a lovely couch, and Karly was thinking about purchasing it new from C&B, so hey, why not try to score it for less on CL? But of course the seller wants $1500, and WILL NOT BUDGE on the price. So, lemme see, that’s $100 off of C&B’s price for a new sofa that can be ordered in your choice of fabric, will not be covered in someone else’s cat hair and popcorn farts, and could be paid for on a credit card.

SCORE!!!

Awww, I have a special place in my heart for this beauty. And I quote, “Carmen electra has the exact same bed, you can see it on cribs. hand forged by famous craftsman, with blue velevet & candle holders go into posts, sweet for setting the mood:)”

So. many. wrong. things. But hey, guess what? It’s only $700. The post states it does need cleaning, though.

Yes. I’m quite sure that it does.

Ok, enough with the scary stuff. I’m no SusieQ over at Eye Spy, but from time to time I do find a few goodies. I usually harass Karly with 800 emails enticing her to buy them, but she is highly resistant. It kind of hurts my feelings. I mean bargain goods are like my baby children (no offense to Ike… there’s enough love to go around for everyone). Anyway, I hope that someone out there can love these little guys as much as I do.

Teak loveseat and TWO matching chairs for $399. Snatch it up before Room Service does, because as much as I adore them, their entire inventory seems to be coming from Craigslist these days.

Lamps for $10 each. $10 for that gold mid mod eyeball lamp! TEN.

I know it’s not for everyone, but I think this sofa is so awesome. Love the tribal print and the wrapped legs. $200, but it’s been listed for a while, so offer less.

Pair of Pace tables for $250. Offer less. If I didn’t already have that behemoth of a coffee table, or if there were a pair of end tables, these would be MINE.

Sweet little chrome and glass dining table for $50. Offer less.

Lane walnut two tier coffee table for $90. Offer less.

This isn’t really my style, but it’s pretty insane. Awesome 50′s king sized lacquered mahogany bed. It also separates into two twin beds. $550, but yes — you should offer less.

Ok, that’s it for my marathon run through Austin Craigslist. If anyone out there buys any of my finds, let us know and send in a picture of it in its new home, and I’ll post it. Nothing would make me happier than to disperse my addiction elsewhere. Because I just can’t keep storing stuff in the garage.

Today marks day one of The Hunny’s stupid week long business trip to LA, which means for the next five days it’ll just be me and precious Baby Ike. Now I’m not a religious person, but I do believe I just crossed myself all Father, Son and Holy Ghost, style. Anyhoo, Karly promised to think about maybe possibly potentially accompanying me and the babe on an Ikea shopping spree this Friday, which would be Ike’s second trip to Ikea although he visited at least 867 times in utero. In fact, we went so often while renovating the kitchen that we may have named our firstborn son after Ikea (he’s going to love this story when he gets older).

These days I can’t just jet off to Austin’s northernmost reaches whenever I feel like it — I have to PLAN, so I think I’m going to get started by typing up my dreamboat shopping list. Some of these things might get boughten, and some of them might not. By Friday, I will probably be playing fast and loose with the credit card, but I can always claim delirium as an excuse.

Part Most of Ikea’s allure lies in its flagrant cheapitude. Clockwise from top left: the Fado pendant light will be going over the kitchen sink (but you know I will be painting that hardware a bronzy gold), Gilda pillows for the living room, yet more Aina linen curtains to form a giant sexy curtain wall behind my bed, and loads of Elly dishtowels.

I have no use whatsoever for either of these new Ikea Charlotta fabrics, but I am in love, sweet love, with both of them, especially the Block print on the left.

How adorable is Ikea’s new Dekad alarm clock? As if I needed something other than Ike to help me wake up… Whatevs. For $5.99, it’s coming home with mama.

The time has come for Ike to get a highchair, and I had been planning — nay, counting — on buying Ikea’s Leopard chair on the left, but it got discontinued due to some supposed safety issues. DAMN IT. Now, instead of looking at a Casala inspired, ultra cool leopard, I’m going to have to settle for a wimpy old Antilop. Definitely not king of the jungle, but least it’s cheap.

In other news, I have a pillow and blanket problem. Behold:

Cute stuff: Karlstad, super cheap Henny, and Gilda pillows in two different colors.

My blanket fetish has been spurred to new heights by these inexpensive offerings. Clockwise from top left: Henny, Stoff in charcoal and natural, and Sticka.

ZOMG I want this so bad! The new Solig solar powered floor lamps are scorching hot.

Ok, so what I really want is this dumb CB2 knit pouf thing, but it only comes in puke green. WHY CB2? WHYYYY? Must everything come in some kicky punch color? Would it kill you to make it in white or black or gray? Whatever. I plan to fill the gaping pouffle shaped hole in my life with Ikea’s Alseda, which is A) not green and B) hella cheap. $29.99 — take that, CB2 bitches!

I want a new bed, so I plan to peruse Ikea’s offerings. So far, I’m interested in these fine specimens:

Queen of ubiquity, the Malm. Perhaps painted white?

I’m pretty intrigued by the Aneboda‘s shape, but I’m a little concerned about those screw things in the corners. Will this look like a cheap piece of crap?

And of course there is the super dreamy Edland, which would unfortunately draw the eye right up to the nursty faux wood grained ceiling fan over our bed. What? It gets hot in Texas.

Does anybody have one of these beds? Do they even make them in King sizes?

Speaking of cheap, what do you think about this:

I’m a little embarrassed to even post the Tranby, but I’ve been looking for a pair of round mirrors for my living room and why the bleep is everything so expensive? I don’t know about this, though… I kind of feel like it belongs at TJ Maxx.

And finally, IMPORTANT! IMPORTANT! I need your help:

We neeeeed a new rug, and I want something big, cheap and flatwoven, because I am sick to death of woolen tumbleweeds blowing through the house. Which of these Stockholm rugs do you prefer for my living room? The furniture has been rearranged, but the pieces are still the same. I’m worried that the triangle rug will be too busy, but will the striped one get dirty on the white parts? Plus everyone in the universe has the striped one — should that disqualify it? Plus I’m not even sure that Ikea still makes the large 8.5 x 11 size. Does anyone know if they still carry it?

Ok, by my calculations I have spent approximately $3459 virtual dollars, and that doesn’t even include all the cinnamon rolls and ice cream cones I plan to eat. Gotta trim the list down. What do you dudes like?

Somehow, I managed to sneak in a ton of grownup fun this past week/end, which has been super amazing, but also exhausting. The good news is that stuff has been happening at the house, mostly because I furiously cleaned and rearranged the place before my guest arrived, but also because we ventured more than a mile from the house and did some real shopping. HOORAY! Guess what I bought? You’ll never guess…

My lighting obsession forced me to load up The Hunny and Ike and drive waaaaaaaaaaaay far away, to the southern wilds of Austin, where this golden whale of a lamp was patiently awaiting escape from its scary creepy, soon to be ex, owners. Thank goodness I was able to rescue it.

Happily it was not terribly abused, although it has some fritzy wiring issues (exposed wires: dangerous, or super dangerous for children?), and it’s a lil dented, and the odd scuff and scrape mar its gorgeously golden visage, but you know what? She is beautiful to me.

Look! Another picture of her… photo overkill? Well, too damn bad. I’m pretty excited about the way she frames the room. Also, the purchase of this lamp allowed me to get rid of two other lamps that were annoying me. Also, you are not allowed to make fun of the twisty lamp on the console, because even though it, too, is annoying, it’s only temporary. Let’s face it — next month this will probably look like a totally different room.

Since I bought the arc lamp, I had to do something with the living room lamps, so they went into our bedroom. But then I had to do something with the old bedroom lamps, so they went into Ike’s room. Aww, look, two bald eagles are keeping watch over the guest bed in Ike’s room — the room that doesn’t even have a crib in it because Ike is still sleeping in our room. That’s another, totally different, story, but it does explain why I don’t have any pictures of the lamps in our bedroom (because I didn’t feel like cleaning it, and also there is a giant crib in the middle of the room that will probably never, ever leave. Sigh).

Anyway, I couldn’t just stop with the lamp because I was getting used to the feel of money flying out of my pockets, so I bought this crazy ass smoked glass diamond mirror thing, which I thought was going in the hallway…

But duh, even a ding dong could tell that it’s way too big for the space. Now what am I going to do with that stupid mirror? It’s not wide enough to go over the console table. Obviously I am out of shopping practice.

For absolutely no reason I am ending this post with a gratuitous picture of Brian, because he is such a handsome boy, and he makes me happy.

Hope y’all enjoyed the fruits of my shopping labors. I worked REALLY HARD at buying these fine, fine items, but now I am broke and will have to make do with spraypaint and ingenuity for the time being. Don’t worry — I’ll find something to paint if it kills me. I’m on a roll.

It’s the Monday before Thanksgiving and I know what’s on your collective mind: turkey and giblets. You were daydreaming about giblets, right? Because I really sense a giblet zeitgeist sweeping the nation… no? Well, I have been known to be wrong. Occasionally. Anyway, I should be preparing for the annual Thanksgiving trek, which will be made exponentially more interesting this year by the presence of a certain 4 month old someone during the six hour drive to Texarkana, but instead I have Black Friday on the brain. It’s not that I believe sales are more important than family, it’s just that I’m still on a decorating kick and I stumbled onto something I want, and damned if I’m paying full price for it (because I’m broke). Also, if you were trying to decide what to buy me for Christmas, here you go:

I know! It’s so… normal. So reasonable at $68. So very much not a bedazzled reindeer skull. But this colorblock rug from Urban Outfitters represents a little slice of inspiration for me. I think I want to redo my bedroom. You know — the bedroom I’ve never showed you because it’s so two years ago. I could keep most of my furniture in my fantasy redo, but I’m going to need a new headboard and linens. And a new rug. Me likey this one. It feels kinda Bauhaus to me. But I need it to go on sale because that other stuff ain’t gonna be free, and you know I just redid the dining room, and when The Hunny reads this he is going to KILLKILLKILL.

I digress. Sort of. You see, after I found this rug, I started looking at UO’s other offerings, and you know — they have some good stuff.

Like these pillows. I’ll take the top one, and maybe if Karly is nice, she’ll get the bottom one for a Christmas present. I’m a very giving person.

I would also like to give myself this origami quilt. I’m a bit concerned about the flowery underside, but I think overall it would do a swell job covering the futon in my office.

I could give this bench to Ike for his room, because I’m sure it tops every four month old’s Christmas list.

I tell you, The Hunny has just been slavering over this cotton Rorschach rug a la Andy Warhol, and who am I to deny his dreams? Of course, I wouldn’t put it on the floor. It would make a much better wall hanging or upholstery material.

I’m sure there’s someone out there who really needs this Rya style shag rug, but no one’s going to buy a 4×6 rug for $198, Urban Outfitters. Put that baby on sale!

I am really digging the arty prints and finishes on lots of UO’s home goods. I wouldn’t be mad if someone gave me this paint splatter vase.

However, I am wondering what you dudes think about this Painter’s Chair, so called because it’s covered in… paint. It’s $298. Thoughts?

And, ok, I know it’s not related to interiors, but I had to show you UO’s Booty Buddy Blanket. THAT IS A SNUGGIE. And yet I find it repulsively compelling…. This confirms my suspicion that Snuggies might actually be awesome if they came in nicer prints.

While I’m busy twiddling my thumbs waiting for some of this stuff to go on sale, you might want to head over and check out the home goods UO already has on sale, like Alexander Girard quilts for DIRT CHEAP (if you like that sort of thing),  good deals on kilim rugs, and cute lamps. It’s never to early to start Christmas shopping. For yourself. I mean for others.

As you may remember from Erin’s post last Friday, Anthropologie recently dropped into austin, rubbed it’s faux flea market goo on every last street corner, then took pretty pictures of the results.  What can I say, Austin is a star, Austin shines, she deserves to have the rest of her pretty pictures shown.  Don’t worry, it’s easy to ignore the $300 cotton tops.

We pick up right where Erin left off:  smack dab in the middle of the catalog and in the middle of town.  I’m 90% sure this was shot at Flashback Vintage.  A shabby shack on South First with western boots and pants for days.  There’s also lots of pyrex, which makes me happy.

Hot Gossip:  This shop used to be in a different location (I won’t say where) they moved and the house they used to rent was torn down and a well designed local restaurant was built.  BUT, looks can be deceiving, without saying the name of the new location I will tell you that I will never ever go there again.  Last year I did some web work for the owners for free (I owed a favor to the owner’s best friend).  THEN, I went to said restaurant for dinner and left with a $140 bill, they didn’t even comp a glass of wine.  

So, there’s your hot austin gossip:  Flashback = good, business in old location = bad

These photos were both shot on South Congress Avenue.  Left was taken from some ole shop window looking out to the street.  Right is in front of Jo’s coffee, which Erin told you about Friday.  Here’s some info you didn’t get:  Their Chai tea is too watered down, even if you ask for extra chai.  Their BBQ pulled pork is worth driving across town for, if you don’t do meat, the tofu is just as good (but lame because there’s no meat in it) and if you drink regular coffee, the iced turbo is AWESOME.  Voila

I do believe that this was also shot at Flashback Vintage.  I have run out of gossip on this joint.

All of these pix were taken at Roadhouse Relics, purveyors of all things neon.  The top right image is an old sign from the Deep Eddy Cabaret that has now been reclaimed by Roadhouse and sits in their lot.  Deep Eddy Cabaret still stands and slings $2 Lone Stars like there’s no tomorrow.

*Insider Tip:  If you are going to partake in the cabaret’s drink specials, might I suggest that you do so after swimming in it’s namesake:  the Deep Eddy pool.  It’s pretty much the most perfect place in town:  it’s a gigantic pool that feeds off of a cold freshwater spring.  You get all that natural water, but there’s no dirt or fishies in the mix.  It’s the jam.

This postcard mural is also at Roadhouse Relics – my god, what isn’t at that place.  It was designed at painted by my friends, the geniuses at Blue Genie.  We sang the praises of Blue Genie once before HERE

I can promise that the model in this picture has never eaten at Fran’s Hamburgers.  One bite of their greesy burgers and ice cream floats would keep her from fitting in the frame.  The place is cute, but do as I do:  get a yummy crushed-ice diet coke.

Fun Fact:  This place is sandwiched between a meat processing plant and Birds Barbershop on South Congress.

Oh! Another fun fact:  See how you can sorta make out a little yellow bungalow house in the bottom left of this picture, right by the sign post?  That house has a big hairy goat living in it’s yard, the goats name is Nic (according to the sign the pet owners erected).  This house is only 1/2 a block off of one of the busiest streets in Austin.

Ok, this is where my tour-guidery gets a little shakey.  It’s not for lack of Austin knowledge, but for lack of theater love that I totally fail on these next few shots.  If I had to make a bet, I would probably say this was shot at the Vortex Theater (excuse me, Vortex Repertory Company).  I was there once, it was for a wedding.

Same.  Let’s talk about those South African Grazing Sheep.  Pretty cute, aye?  But for $448 a pop, I’m guessing my money will be better spent flying to Africa, taking a safari then picking those sheep up for 4 dollars U.S.

Good Lord, Anthropologie, are you still showing me the Vortex?  Ok, here’s a fact:  within walking distance of the Vortex are 2 Joel Mozersky designed spaces: Red House (positive: yummy lemon-grass mojitos, stellar horse decor, negative: doors shut at midnight, boo) and el chilito a yummy taco stand (apparently the stripes on the side of the building were Joel’s idea, cuz you can’t step inside.) 

Oh, also, those lights are $398 each.  As in Each.  Just One.  Not a cluster.

Photo one, another theater shot, ugh.  Photo 2 – the poster close up – is actually shot in Nashville where the catalogs were designed and printed.  

Also in Nashville. 

There you go.  Now you know everything you ever wanted to know about Austin.  

Kisses!

I pretty much don’t buy new things. Mostly it’s because I’m cheap, but when I’m making some pretense at self righteousness (usually when trying to justify the purchase of yet another thrifted chair to the Hunny), I say that I’m saving the earth. Pretty much single handedly. Ok, Karly helps, too. However, we’re remodeling our kitchen, and gosh darn it’s hard to thrift built in cabinets. Plus we’re furnishing/decorating a nursery, and used sheets and rugs for le bebe just won’t work for me. This newfound taste for uh, newness, has resulted in THREE trips to Ikea in the past week alone. If you’ve never been to an Ikea store, just know that a) there is never one conveniently located by your house and b) it takes hours just to navigate the showroom labyrinth.

You see, Ikea’s “floorplan” is actually a nefarious plot designed to keep you trapped within the store for the longest possible time without actually causing brain damage. But I can tell you, it comes damn close. So today, I’m going to shower you with all the Ikea knowledge I’ve gleaned over the past few months of epic trips, in the vain hope that I might spot some goodies for you and prevent Ikea overload should you ever step into the store yourself. Even so, it might be best to tie a rope to your car, all Poltergeist style. Just in case.

First of all, what in the world have I bought there? Well, this corner of our nursery (yes, there is a bed in our nursery, but don’t worry — there’s a crib, too) features a Ludde sheepskin on the rocker ($49.95), the Stockholm nubby throw ($29.99), a pair of black Jorun pillows ($14.99 ea), and linen Aina curtains ($49.99 for 2). Sorry, Le Tigre is not available at Ikea. I have to say that of all these items, I think the curtains are a steal. They’re linen, 8 ft tall with rod pockets in the back and faux pinch pleats in the front. Good deal.

Additionally, I’ve bought a bazillion dollars worth of kitchen stuff there, including Abstrakt white cabinets and Nexus brown black cabinets. (You can read all about my obsession with both in this post.) I’ve been shopping for some kitchen accessories to go with, and I think these Asker egg shaped cups on rails are pretty swift. They also look nice in this cute office, which is sadly marred by that creepy “Hello.” Link via Apartment Therapy.

And, of course, I love my giant wicker beehive light ($89.99 for the biggun) that hangs in our dining room, which currently looks nothing like this. At all.

In addition to all these purchases, my pinched pocketbook lusts after — but will probably not buy — the following items:

Blob lights! Ok, I might actually buy a pair of these bad boys because THE HUNNY LIKES THEM. This does not happen. Ever. Ikea Jonisk, $49.99. Awesome proportions — it’s big.

I would also lurve to have an entirely new patio set… alas, I am broke. But if you’re shopping for a giant umbrella, Ikea has some super fantastic ones. This cantilevered badass is HUGE. Ikea Karlso, $129.00 for 10 feet of shade.

Ikea also rolled out these new deck chairs for the summer season. Brommo has all the elements of a classic: clean lines, decent construction, and it’s comfy. Plus you gotta love a good rope chair. $59.99.

You could always imitate the effervescent Ione Skye and buy these lounge chairs for your outdoor wonderland. Karl Skrona is kinda pricey at $169, but if it’s good enough for ex Mrs. David Netto… (Netto, what were you thinking, anyway? Ione is adorable!)

If you’re among the rich and famous and have $129 to burn on ONE chair, the Ange is Salternini sweet. Oh, and Karly and I would each like a set of six while you’re at it. Thanks!

Anna from Door Sixteen has the Karlstad couch, and I have to say that sucker is super comfortable! Another friend has the same sofa in a sectional configuration, and I am sorely tempted to sell my leather sofas and buy one, too. It’s that squishy good. Do yourself a favor and buy the best fabric they have. $599 for gray wool flannel.

One of Ikea’s greatest strengths is probably their textiles; the rugs in particular are priced well considering the materials and patterns. Clockwise from top left: 1) Admete, two sided cotton runner, $19. 2) Flatweave Jorun, two sided wool, $179. 3) Tarnby, braided jute $99 (much nicer in person — very thick). 4) Stockholm, wool, $229.

They had some pretty cute new duvet covers when I was there, too. Love this one in a child’s room, styled by Creature Comforts. Unni Slinga, $19.99 for duvet cover and two pillowcases.

Ikea’s other greatest strength is its straight up cheapness when it comes to the basics:

Remember my last post about Blobs where I waxed hateful on Damien Hirst and how damn much money he makes for “designing” things like the light configuration in this home? Well, eight Ikea lights later and you’ve got your very own Damien Hirst design. Left: Lillholmen, $9.99. Right: Fado, $29.99. Boo ya!

So, in closing, I would like to summarize all the things I like about Ikea: 1) It’s cheap. 2) Sometimes it’s cool. 3) They have great customer service, as in they will take ANYTHING back. Are you listening muthereffing Target? I’m also in love with tiny Bob, the kitchen designer at the Austin store, and Kumar, the most excellent customer service dude, ever. 4) They have this new deal where using your debit card nets you a 3% credit on your next trip. Yay! Free money! 5) They only have reusable bags — no disposable plastic nasties. 7) “Ice cream” cones. 6) Occasionally they give their products very funny names, like this corkscrew:

But it’s not all sweet smelling rosy stuff. There are things I hate about Ikea, too. 1) It’s far away. 2) It’s really far away. 3) The zombies:

If you’ve ever been to a brick and mortar Ikea store, then you know eactly what I’m talking about.