It’s official.  I can completely and totally stop perusing the internet for any more art or design.  It’s all over.  My mind has been blown and there’s no topping it or going back.

Are you sitting down?  Seriously.  Get ready for me to tell you what’s happening here:

So, here’s the deal:  Cuban photographer Abelardo Morell creates these images ON WALLS via a little process you may have heard of called camera obscura.  Ok ok, backing up:  Morell blacks out the windows of rooms then cuts a small hole in the fabric he’s used to shut out all the light.  That pinhole is used to expose the window’s view onto the opposing wall.  He then takes a picture of the projection using a large format camera.  The film often takes up to 10 hours to expose.  Yeah.  It’s bananas.  I don’t even know if people say that anymore but I feel it’s appropriate here.

Ok.  So I might maybe not shut down the blog tomorrow, but it’s going to be a long long time before I stumble upon something this mind-blowingly good again.

UM, PS. How amazing are the views from each of those rooms, by the way?

Sorry about that title.  I just wasted 5 mintues of my life googling clever sayings and song titles with the word wood in them.  My bucket list is really coming along nicely.  Not.  I do not have a bucket list and if I did I would come up with a better name for it.  Even if it meant I had to spend TEN minutes googling clever sayings and song titles.  What does all this have to do with today’s post?  Nothing, except those are all words that you are reading in today’s post.  capiche?

Anyway, today I’m showing you (an even number of rooms crazy erin) with wood in them.  why?  because my house is finally looking like it may be close to done and there’s not really much wood anywhere so of course all I want now is wood and I want to redo my house.  Let’s do this:

And boom goes the dynamite.  I know I’m giving away Christmas right out of the gate with this one but who can resist.  It’s magically unstoppable.  I want to eat fancy reconfigurations of comfort food at this table until my head explodes.  Note, it will explode from laughter because I will probably be hanging out with some really funny people.

After my hilarity laugh riot meal of ecstasy I will climb these stairs to burn off all those calories.  ha ha no i won’t.  I will turn and look at these stairs and think about what a genius i was for building them.*

*i did not build these stairs.  Please do not write and ask me how i did it.**

**some people actually write and ask us dumb shit like this.  can you believe it?

This perfect potty belongs to furniture designer J.B. Blunk.  He, unlike me with the stairs, carved that sink out of redwood.  Write him and ask your goofy questions, weirdos.

This is old and I don’t know what it is but i do know that it is awesome.  I do have an obsessive blog partner who can probably tell you who’s house this is, when it was built and how long, down to the minute, they took to furnish it.  You can write her too, she loves mail.

picture 1, picture 2, picture 3, picture 4 is unknown source

P.S. I would like to note that 99% of you who write us are awesome and amazing, please don’t take offense to this post.  But there is the 1% out there who will email us with questions like “how did you make that couch” without 1.  letting me know which couch they are talking about and 2. realizing that I am not, in fact, a couch maker.   99%, keep it coming. Love and kisses

So, I’m 4 weeks in to my return to blog land and I have yet to venture outside of our own blog for real inspiration.  Let us quickly recall such posts as the one about my coffee table, and the one about my brother’s coffee table, and the one about the other coffee table that was so large that it was actually a 10-story tree house.  Something about this full time job slash full time mom gig keeps my leash short but when erin posted these psychedelic pics Monday I immediately craved an entire life shift into a home with small rooms that I could cover surface to surface with insane contrasting pattern.  And a naked lady needlepoint pillow.

I stumbled upon the wallpaper company jannelli e volpi, which apparently is super famous and I’m supposed to have known about it but whatever.  Anyway, it looks like a few of their offerings will get me started on my knew psycho house fantasy.

Hell to the yes to the super saturated prisma color floral paper.  On the ceiling?  Yes, fine.

The more subtle little sister.  For the laundry room perhaps?

And lest we forget that they also do floors.  I’m seeing this in the garage.  Matt’s not going to be allowed in there anymore.  It will be where I park some expensive black car like a Rolls Royce or some crap.

Oh, wait, did I forget to mention that they make this RGB wallpaper?  Oh geeze, I really didn’t mean to make you wait for the most badass wall covering of all time.  Sorry guys.  So yeah, this paper is made from 3 overlapping designs, one entirely in blue, one in green and one in… you guessed it… red.  It rocks my face off so no bad comments.

Here it is from another angle.  You’re welcome.

Last week when I posted this new top-ten pad I started thinking about the various spaces we’ve written about in the TWO PLUS years since design crisis hit the interwebs.  The very first place that always pops into my head is the one featured below.  I’ve reposted the post today. (look it was from November of 2008 and only 3 of you have been reading this blog that long)

Originally I was obsessed with the mural in the opening picture, but whenever I think about this space now I always fantasize about the wood paneled walls.  Anyhow, let’s take a look back at the days when I only had 2 cats, thought Missoni chevron was the bees knees, and I hadn’t been pregnant for 41 weeks straight.  Enjoy!

+++

Good morning, good morning! What a wonderful Monday it is thanks to Raina who sent me this insane article from W magazine. After months of loyal readership she has managed to pinpoint, with laser-like accuracy, exactly what mama likes: obscene use of color? Check. Artwork run wild? Check. Garish accessories, interesting use of materials and a view to boot? Check, check, and check. Behold:

You may be wondering if I could actually wake up every morning to such a full-blown-hyper-color attack on my retinas. The answer is: yep, you bet your sweet ass I can. Did you get a load of those dogs? If I thought my pets would still come snuggle up to me at night, Laser and Magnus would be in neon lampshades faster than you could say holy good lord that’s hot.

Let’s talk about what’s going on here: Blessed owners Tobias Meyer (ahem, head of Sotheby’s worldwide contemporary art) and Mark Fletcher pose in front of mural by Brazilian artist Assume Vivid Astro Focus. A John Currin oil is perched above a French 1740s kingwood commode. Commode! Who owns one of those? Jeeze.

These dudes had me at hello, but I’m sure, like me, you’re dying (dying!) for more:

The only dream-shatterer here is the mural on the ceiling, I’m not 100% on that. But really, don’t you all just want to curl up in a little ball next to that pillar while hugging the Missoni pillow, thanking whatever god you believe in that you’re alive? Holy Crap my mind is going to explode!

Time for us all to hyperventilate in tandem:

Andy Warhol gun + LIGHT UP DOLLAR SIGN + a naked man that Nagal would have painted if he’d painted men? It’s just TOO GOOD! Here’s what the owner’s had to say:

Everything is about the reality of it all, about the human condition and facing death. Art right now is about desire, human nature, sexuality, power and violence.

These men are spending life inside a living, breathing piece of art. And I want to strangle them for it.

Kleenex time!

Plywood befriends the trippy Stark carpet while a diptych from Matthew Barney’s Cremaster series hangs above a German 1760 gilt-wood console. The whole kitten-kaboodle is topped by German rococo ormolu candelabra (MATTHEW BARNEY!!! what is this? The freakin Guggenheim?)

The owner’s note that they enjoy using low-grade materials in the design as there is “a hopefullness to it’s unfinished quality.” Um, right. Keep talkin, buddy. Now, don’t get me wrong, j’adore la plywood, but if I even consider putting that moldy old board next to my plethora of craigslist finds, it will be all over. I think it’s important to note the power of context here, with a side note that I, despite my delusions of grandure, am not the head of the world’s premier art auction house.

To wrap it all up, let’s take a look at the window I may or may not have to jump out of:

Do you see the dollar sign reflection? Doesn’t it just make your heart sing? You can all send your thank you notes for providing such a majestic kick off to your week to me at godsend@design-crisis.com*.

*not a real email address, but it should be, huh?

This morning I woke up to a precious gift in my inbox:  Erin sent me a link to one of my new dream houses.  This is a sign of several things 1.  Erin knows me pretty dang well 2.  Erin is slowly making her way back to the interwebs which means that 3.  Hopefully she’ll be taking over for me soon and 4.  You get to see great pictures today.  Let’s do this:

Designed and occupied by Guilherme Torres, this living room fulfills my every last fantasy.  The only thing I would change is the chandelier.  I would replace it with this one.

Hello ceiling!

(ps, what’s up with the tiny fan up there?  It will go the way of the light as soon as I move in, promise)

Chair: stays

G:  replaced with either a K or an M or one other letter that I can’t reveal to you just yet

No to the toys, yes to the texture created by the conduit.  I will also be replacing that spread with something a bit more cheerful.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m still loving this place

I displayed this one XXL so you could get a full frontal of those walls.  I think I need to make this happen somewhere… you know I have my own kitchen to remodel.

I would let Erin stay here when she visits, just for being so kind as to send me this link.

Thanks Erin!  And happy weekend bros!!

xo, K

First of all, I have to thank DC reader Elizabeth for reminding me about M. Design Interiors last week.  You know, M. Design, the design firm that brought us the potty that launched a thousand blog posts:

Yes, you know this room, it lives in this house:

On any other day of my life I would move into this house before you could say flexible interest rate, but today, well, today another one of their interiors is catching my eye.   It’s an odd choice for me, given my affinity for 70s porn inspired homes, but I think this nesting business has gotten the best of me because today I want to live behind these doors:

Not wanting to change a thing about the landscaping around this cozy cottage.  Yes I know bamboo is invasive.  Zip it.

Look what awaits me inside!  I could sit the hell out of those leather chairs.  Erin can sit in one too, we will then discuss what will replace that sofa.  In this fantasy I’m not pregnant and I’m on my third vodka tonic, fyi.

This is where I sleep off my hangover.

Call me crazy but today this is really working for me

Sorry about the pink color block, it’s on the M. Design website and in my cottage fantasy I don’t have to use photoshop in order to write a blog post.

Ok, ok, I know the rest of America is knee deep in autumn, but it’s still 90 degrees here and this outdoor shower looks like a great place to recover from that boozy nap I took earlier in this post.

On a side note:  Elizabeth also mentioned that the head designer for M. Designs is the sister of the blond on Modern Family.  Hot Goss!  On a side side note, one of the reasons I don’t watch that show is because I don’t buy the blond and that dude as a couple.  I like both characters just fine, but I really don’t believe them together.  Sorry everyone, just sayin.

You guys know that I could never paint a color bolder than gray on any of my walls but that doesn’t negate my burning desire to hang out in rooms with some seriously bold color.  Right now I’m being seduced by these moody emerald walls.  Emerald?  I know, go figure.

Twig Hutchinson

Now I’m not going to let a pesky little detail like my current inability to sit on that couch stop me from digging this room.  As soon as the little bambino pops out I can roll all over that yellow beauty.

Zownir Locations

Hmmm, this yellow and emerald combo looks familiar, but that couch is decidedly more practical given my current condition.

Sunset

In person:  could be awesome, could be scary.  I just don’t know.  I hope the towel is clean.

VT Wonen

Kinda emerald, right?

Diane Von Furstenberg

And if, like me, you can’t paint your walls green and, unlike me, you have a gragillion dollars, you can add the sexiest accessory known to mankind to your room via this Dian Von Furstenburg rug.  Psst, I found this over at If the lampshade fits and have been dreaming of it ever since.  Think I can sneak it onto my baby registry?

Good morning all and I apologize for my absence Tuesday.  Internet failure combined with ability to stay awake failure has lead me down a shameful blogless path.  But you all understand, right?  Well-zo, here I am and I’m all well rested to show you some surprisingly un-karly-esque interiors.  Let’s just call it a continuation of Erin’s theme from yesterday.  Like she said, life can’t be all coke tables and mylar wallpaper, right?  Ok, maybe it can, but just not today.  Or yesterday.  But most certainly tomorrow and all those other days after.

Perhaps it’s my constant craving for sleep that has me loving these monochromatic interiors shot by photographer Ditte Isager, but most likely it’s that sexy chandelier / rustic hardwood / window-filled loft combo.  win / win / win / win.

when God builds me a kitchen, this will be one of the photos I show him

For more of Ditte’s work: Home of Ochre

Hey everyone!  I’m Naomi from Thirteen and South, and I’m filling in today while Erin is away.

I wanted to share with you my living room inspiration.  Lot’s of people have a muse when designing a space.  Perhaps its a rug, or a fabric, or even a gorgeous magazine spread.  I found my inspiration in my grandmother’s basement.  Score!

Back in February, when we bought our row house, we knew we were in for a gut job.  I was adamant that under the pink carpets, drop ceilings, fluorescent lights, and layers of smoke-stained wallpaper that there was beautiful space waiting for us.  But after all the labor and stress of the renovation, I had zero motivation to decorate.

I knew this much- I wanted it modern with a mix of neutrals, patterns and eclectic accents.  I wanted a gray sofa.  And I want pops of orange.  Other than that I was completely and utterly LOST.

Then one evening Nana (who has impeccable taste) invited me down to her basement to view her unused art collection.  I spied this framed art and knew if had to be mine…

I liked that it was geometric, colorful, modern and vintage all in one.

Turns out it is actually a scarf that has been sewed onto the canvas.   It has been signed by the artist, numbered 30/150 and dated, 1969.  Which made it all the more unique and special in my mind.

A little research proved the artist to be Victor Vasarely.  He paired up with Escada to make these scarves.  Being art ignorant, that didn’t mean a lot to me, but Erin assured me he is one of her favorite artists and I am a lucky ass bitch.

And let me tell you- just as a good muse does- the scarf worked its magic.  My decorating block was lifted and I was able to fill in pieces around the art.

My first move was to buy some pillows.  Something with a little texture and something a little wild.

A throw blanket and rug soon followed….

(yep, I have that brass tray table that Karly talked about here.
I love it, but am planning to switch it out for a more comfortable ottoman.)

I’m not done yet, but I know my scarf will help me finish the space off.  It reminds me not to be afraid of color or pattern, but also to let the art do the talking and fill in with simpler pieces.  Hopefully I wont put Mr Vasarely to shame.

I’m also contemplating getting a new frame.  Maybe something a little bit more substantial, and possibly brass/gold.  Like Nana’s…

Her second Vasarely piece, in her foyer.

I hope you enjoyed my little tour.  Erin and Karly- thanks so much for having me over, and E thanks sharing your art wisdom with me!!

Every few months I purge my interiors inspiration folder (once it gets too full for me to flip through enjoyably) and start fresh.  I’m usually pretty glad to move most of the images into an archive folder but there are always a few that I keep in my active file.  I just never seem to get sick of them.  Here are 2

Not too exciting, I know, but something about it just calls to me.  Erin would probably kick me off the blog for lusting after a room with such an offensive floral display, but I would defend myself by reinforcing the awesomeness of that sofa and coffee table.  Perhaps if she were to spend a quiet baby-free afternoon on that couch all would be forgiven?

If I took Erin’s chesterfield and reupholstered it in white leather, then placed it next to my Oasis and followed that with a complete redesign of my living room, I’d have this.  See, I’m like almost there.

There were only a couple of other rooms that made the cut during my interior folder reorganization, but I feel like I’ve shown them to you 872 times, I was worried that if I went for 873 you just might stop reading the blog altogether, and we don’t want that, now do we?

I’ve been a design magazine whore for as long as I can remember, like a Pavlovian dog I instantly start to salivate as soon as a new issue of Living Etc hits the stands.  The pristinely styled spaces are so perfectly lovely and profoundly unattainable my head starts to spin.  But even the most lush interior landscape presents itself as a dream:  there are no electrical cords or family photos.  Stylists and photo editors work tirelessly to maintain the fantasy.

So after years of pining away for the unattainable glossy spaces, I’m a bit bored of it all.

Consider this post a pallet cleanser.

All rooms shot by amateurs.  All found in various corners of the interwebs.

Isn’t it nice to look at a bit of a mess for once?  I would love to see a magazine spread with similar honesty (and no, leaving a pair of shoes in the shot doesn’t count)

I would love to see the spaces you are living in.  Go ahead send me some pics, if enough people join the party I’ll do a post with your spaces.  Be sure to let me know if you would like for me to link to you along with the picture or if you should remain anonymous.

Ever since the backyard demo, which, sorry, apparently I can’t stop talking about, I’ve been mildly obsessed with plants and gardens.  The lust I normally reserve for interior design porn has temporarily been redirected and I now find myself looking longingly at well manicured lawns and big fat texas gardens.  Because I swear on all things holy that this will not become a landscaping blog and I want to give you what you’re here for I’ve got a roundup of plants indoors.  Yes, I want them inside now too.  Basically, I want to do all my interior decor shopping at the Natural Gardener.

These are my favorite plants in today’s roundup.  If anyone knows what the hell they are, pretty pleeze speak up.

Plant party on the right there is coming in at a close second. It sorta kinda looks like the world’s largest rubber plant, but I’m pretty sure it’s something else.  Any ideas?  This is the part where I admit that I don’t really know anything about plants except that I really really like them.  Oh wait, I do know a lot about succulents, which are strangely absent from today’s roundup.

I went back and forth on whether or not to post this one, after all, that wee plant is a bit sad.  However, he really stands out in this room and I thought that was what was most important.  Non?

This tree is awesome but what’s with the potted plants in checkerboard formation outside?

Ok, so these last 2 shots are of retail locations, but I thought they were pretty snazzy (love that plant above!) so they’re onboard.

Delicious!