Hi guys. I started writing another monster post on buying rugs but then I got overwhelmed and more than a little worried I don’t know what the hell I’m talking about. When I began studying maps of the Middle East and researching the major rug weaving cities of Iran I realized I may have bitten off more than I could chew right now. I’m just a little OCD like that. I’ll get around to it soonish but I need to let things incubate for a while. In the meantime, I highly recommend this article on buying rugs.

Also, I am super busy because my kids have succumbed to cold #857 this year. Both are encrusted with all manner of viscous fluids and it’s a full time job keeping that bizness off my new rug.

It’s much prettier (darker and less contrasty) in person but I’m already stressing about how overwhelming it is in its new space. I foresee a major rug and furniture rearranging party on the horizon.

 Lest you think me a heartless bastard who only cares about my furnishings, here are my cute little people. It’s good that they are cute because they destroy everything I own.

Which is why my fabulous Jenny Andrews Anderson painting is still safely rolled up and not actually lying about on the floor like this. I can’t wait to get it stretched and hung over my fireplace because it is HUGE and I love it.

Speaking of art, I’m selling this large (4 ft) 70s abstract painting. Austinites, email me if you’re interested.

Still speaking of art, I’m slightly obsessed with this amazing gouache painting I didn’t buy. Why didn’t I buy this? Oh yeah — because I already spent all my fun money on art and rugs.

Strict budgeting is largely sponsored by the impending (soon? I hope?) kitchen redo we’re saving for. I’ve been to see Sanders for paint help and I think I’ve narrowed the cabinet colors down to three choices. We shall discuss this ad nauseum later, but for now just know that babies love Sanders.

Last but not least, I got new business cards! Bryan Keplesky designed the logos and Karly Hand designed the cards. I think they’re kind of President of the Illuminati awesome.

Publicly launching ones photography and decorating career at the end of a series of crappy phone pictures is undoubtedly a smooth move. Please do see my photo site here and my latest house tours here and here if you’re interested in hiring me to work for you.

You know where to find me.

Today marks the second visit of the cleaning lady, and I’m pretty sure she’s going to mutiny when she sees how dirty this place has gotten in two weeks. Little does she know that my cat attracts leaves like velcro and paint in the sink is a state of being over here. But she might also notice that since the last time she was here, new curtains were boughten and the bedroom has been painted and my shelves for the front room are back, sporting a fresh coat of glossy paint.

Good things. Things that will appear in pictures soon. I promise.

Some bad things might have happened, too. Things like our fancy marble dining table arrived cracked down the middle. And I didn’t order enough wallpaper for the baby’s room. And I’m 99% sure I didn’t order enough wallpaper for the powder room, either… did someone say wallpaper calculator? Who? Wha?

I don’t know — maybe it’s the fact that I’m dead tired and HUGE, but I just don’t care anymore.

That’s why they call me mellow yellow…

today.

Tomorrow I will assuredly have a nervous breakdown since I’ve been with Ike all day all summer with no school, plus his birthday party is this Saturday and I haven’t prepped AT ALL.

Oh and the baby will be here in a month.

Mellow yellow, dudes.

Mellow.

[pinterest]

via

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Yep.  Still feelin it.

Ok, I know that usually this is an interiors blog where we enjoy the best and brightest of interior porn.  BUT, technically, since the blog is called design crisis, sometimes we dabble in other arenas, fancying ourselves worldly enough to talk about such things as art and graphics and music.  Well, today I’m pretty sure we have our first ever fashion related post and I bring this to you not because I know (or care) a thing about fashion but because the product presentation in this campaign is BEYOND WORDS.  It’s Dadaism meets Robert Palmer meets Pop Art meets Bear Grylls.  So, to say the least, it’s totally rocking my face off.  Shall we?

Ka-Pow!  I was having a hard time deciding which image to start with, but I figured egg on the head was as good as any.  Oh, also there are earrings in this image and they are by Alexis Bittar.  More More More!

There are a lot of animals happening here, which you know sends my heart racing 6-ways-to-sunday.  Is there anything better than a cat photoshopped to do something human?  Or, say, a zebra wearing a couch for a hat?  I didn’t think so.

That concludes the animal portion of our program.  But wait!  There’s more!

So awesome

Oh, my, god. Becky, look at that art.
It is so big. It looks like,
one of those abstract expressionists.
But, you know, who understands those art guys?
They only paint things, because,
they were like total alkies, ‘kay?
I mean, that art, is just so big.
I can’t believe it’s just so round, it’s like,
out there!

I mean – whoa. Look!
It’s just so … black!

I like big art and I can not lie
You other sistas can’t deny
That when a big paintin’ hangs in an itty bitty place
With that color all in your face
You get sprung, wanna write out a check
Cause you’re a lusty wanton wreck

This art ain’t made for sharing
I’m hooked and I can’t stop staring

Oh canvas, I wanna get with you
And take your picture
My accountant tried to warn me
But that shape you got makes me so horny

Ooh, Rump-o’-smooth-stroke
Been thinking about you since I woke
Well, come home, please me
‘Cause you ain’t an average new piece

I’ve seen small paintings
To hell with all them things

You’re a net asset,
Got me goin’ like a turbo ‘Vette

I’m tired of magazines
Sayin’ gallery walls are the thing
Take the average woman and ask her that
Art gotta pack much back

So, ladies! (Yeah!) Ladies! (Yeah!)
Does that painting match the carpet? (Hell yeah!)
Then just take it! (Take it!) Take it! (Take it!)
Trust your inner gut!

Baby got back!

[Nuevo Estilo, Miles Redd, Gary Hutton, Alex Katz, Marilyn Minter, Robert Motherwell, Pamplemousse, Elle Decor, OWI]

I know how ridiculous this sounds, but before I went to Europe I would never have expected to dig the museum scene over there as much as I did. I’ve been to plenty of American museums in my tenure as an artist and art teacher, but naturally there is a distinctly American flavor to what’s happening over here. It’s the flavor of newness, of a wink-wink nudge-nudge self reflexiveness, of an endlessly creative populace with no distinct past and an overwhelming urge to reinvent the present while hurrying toward the future.

And then you have Europe — a continent teeming with centuries old, continuously operating cultures. Old art was never my thing (so dark! so fussy!) but to see it in person is to experience an almost religious revelation. I thought my head might explode from the amazingness of it all.

This is all my roundabout way of saying I really wish I could go to Holland and see this show:

Let’s see — incredible architecture: check. Color and light like only the Dutch can do: check. Old art that will make you doubt the dubious talents of any contemporary painter: check. Add in a few sly contemporary feints and tricks and I’m altogether annoyed that I haven’t already booked a plane ticket. Stupid money.

Rineke Dijskstra? Hot double damn.

The Portrait Pavilion at the ancient Duivevoorde Castle in the Netherlands is simply stunning. The castle is almost 1000 years old, the paintings are hundreds of years old, and the idea is so right now. It’s like looking at time in a three way mirror.

via Design Upcomers

20×200 can be hit or miss for me. On one hand, it makes works by master artists like the Starn twins or Roger Ballen available to middle class collectors, and it also spreads the word about up and coming photographers like Todd Hido and Eirik Johnson. But it can often dive deep into the twee abyss, cranking out overly cute editions. I don’t fault them for it (hey, we’ve all got to make a living somehow), but I like 20×200 best when it takes risks and puts out thoughtful work from relatively unknown artists. And if that thoughtful work is aesthetically interesting, well then super extra bonus points.

Long story short, I like recently published Jenny Odell’s work a lot. Thank you, 20×200. You get a gold star from me.

Odell’s composite images created from satellite views feature industrial buildings, pools, grain silos, and boats. Voyeurism coupled with a smidgen of melancholy, finished by a dash of slick techno remove, makes for a fine series of work.

195 Yachts, Cargo Lines, Tankers, and Other Ships is available for purchase at 20×200 HERE.

I really hope the pools are up for grabs next…

Bet you thought this blog wasn’t updated because I was out having a baby. Ha! Wrong! I’m still here, and with TONS of time to kill I’ve returned to my very favorite pass time: thrifting! Check out my most recent find:

She’s 23″ x 27″ of pure awesomeness. For that, I have to thank my darling son for taking his sweet sweet time. It may have cost mommy $4.99 and several days of impatient heartache, but it’s paying off in spades.

Alert:  Regular column Trend Alert has recently changed it’s name (see above).  I’m feeling like it’s more appropriate.  Show of hands?

The trend to which I’m alerting you today has thus far only shown itself a couple of times and I thus have little evidence of it’s existence.  However, I’m confident that, come Christmas, every Etsy dealer worth their weight in screen printed tote bags will have a variation on this theme:

Handmade & painted axes by Best Made Co

OK, these axes are beautifully crafted and the color stripes are a lovely touch, but I can’t help but have like, 472 eye rolls.  I mean, really, who among you needs a $220 axe that you really can’t justify using?  Please do not leave a comment about art, and that $220 is cheap-ola for art.  Yes, I get that too, I really really get it.  But I would rather take a $36 home depot axe to the head than fall prey to this hipster crap trap.

Striped arrows by Fredericks and Mae

Yes, it’s all pretty, but for some reason it’s just annoying.  Happy Weekend, the end.

Fun fact #1 about me:  I don’t ride elevators.  I have a case of claustrophobia that’s pretty well under control with the exception of elevator rides.  They send me into panic, so when a client scheduled a meeting with me for yesterday on the 14th floor of her building I almost had a heart attack.  I literally woke up in the middle of the night 2 nights ago freaking out about the impending tiny transport.

I arrived at the building yesterday, having employed all my yoga calming techniques on the car ride over, feeling pretty good.  However, as soon as the elevator door opened my face went flush and my heart started racing.  I started to wonder if I could walk up 14 flights of stairs while 9 months pregnant.  I would have done it any other time.  Of course, the answer this time was no.

I did manage to sweet talk a building employee into riding up with me, it always helps to have someone to talk to so I can distract myself.  I made it up without incident, I just had to get back down.

(sorry for the novel everyone)

So I had my meeting, it went well and it was time for me to be on my way.  I walked to the elevator but just couldn’t bring myself to step inside.  I thought:  certainly I can walk DOWN 14 flights of stairs.

I walked to the stairwell, checked the levers on the doors: they seemed to be working properly and felt confident I wouldn’t get locked in there.  Wrong.  Once the door shut I gave it a test open to be sure I could get out.  Nope.  Locked.  I ran down a flight and checked the door on floor 13:  nope, locked.  Shit.  Totally stuck in the stairwell.

I called my client, whom I had just met with:  no answer.  I called my husband (could he drive downtown and let me out?) no answer.  Who did I know that worked downtown and could put up with my neurosis?  Should I call the police?  WTF??  I was in full hyperventilation mode at this point.  I tried calling my client one last time:  she answered on the last ring and came to my rescue.  Luckily, she’s super cool and thought the whole thing was hilarious and not bizarre in the least.  She even offered to ride the elevator down with me.  Thanks Jennifer!

So, the point is, if you have to get stuck in a stairwell (don’t! It’s scary!) pray to god it looks like this one:

Framed, by the John Jones team in collaboration with Stuart Haygarth, installed at the Victoria and Albert Museum.  More here.

In case you don’t already know, Jenny of My Favorite and My Best has opened up a whopper of an excellent discussion about trends you hate. A lot of people had oodles to say on the subject — it seems most of us are tired of seeing the same stuff endlessly recycled, co opted, and manicured, into cookie cutter rooms that look pretty in pictures. It really got me thinking that I’m super fatigued from seeing the same trends over and over again, but there are very few things that I truly hate, no matter the context.

Well, I’m not so fond of this poster:

We’ve all seen it a zillion times and that certainly adds to my general sense of malaise here. But also, I just don’t like art with words on it. Never have. Oh, well, except for Barbara Kruger.

So now I am already a hypocrite, because it seems that I do, on occasion, enjoy art with words on it. To add insult to injury, a few days ago, I saw this:

Yep, those words. On art. By my own logic, I should hate, right? And yet, I have mad respect for Louise Bourgeois, one of the coolest ladies that has ever graced this earth. If I grow up to be even a fraction as awesome as she was, I will consider myself, well… awesome.

So, I suppose what I want to say in my own rambling way is that I am trying to be less reactionary.

Am I implying that we can’t ever say we really dislike — maybe even hate — something? God no. That would be boring. But I personally am going to take a page from Nietzsche and exercise my will to power. To a large extent, that means living according to one’s own instincts. In decor terms, we can be inspired by many things, but just aping trends produces superficiality. In the same way, hating trends just because they’re trendy is — perhaps — equally superficial. And it closes off a hell of a lot of possibilities.

Pretend you’re living in a cave and the rest of the world doesn’t exist. Do you honestly love it? Well, then keep it.

To Cranky Girl, the commenter on MFAMB’s site who owns an original Keep Calm poster because it has ties to her family and specific value to her, I say: display that ugly poster proudly. If it’s meaningful to you, who cares what anyone else thinks?

Even me.

Quick!  Let’s list off some of the things I love:  animal furniture, groovy sculptures, anything gold, pretty pieces of furniture, well organized spaces, animals, animals, animals.  I think that’s all.

So, what happens when you take all of those things (minus the gold) and roll them into one?  Karly is in heaven

Choose Your Own Adventure cabinet by Misha Kahn

Designed to hold all the goodies strewn about his floor, the CYOA cabinet is what dreams are made of, people.

See how messy life is without it

and now everything is so neatly put away.  Tada.