In remodeling my home I’ve come to realize that you make good friends with the people who help you then, once your project is over, you don’t get to see your redecorating buddies too much anymore.  This is why we invented the ask Sander’s column:  even though most of my house is painted, I still have an excuse to stop on by Benjamin Moore (Hill Country Paint to you South Austinites) any time I want (insert maniacal laugh here).  So, when Jason wrote us with an email lovingly titled “dumb dude needs help” I was more than happy to pay a visit to the King of Paint.

Jason recently purchased this ranch and is experiencing something my husband would never dare to dream of:  his wife has handed him decorating carte blanche.  From what I’ve heard about his plans for the inside, hello Cole & Son wallpaper, he’s doing a bang-up job.  The outside, as you can see, needed serious consultation.  Jason asked Sanders to present him with 2 options:  1. Trim, accent, and door paint leaving the brick as-is, and 2. A palette for painting the whole kitten-kaboodle, brick and all.  We’ll start with the former.

Sander’s first suggestion is to use Benjamin Moore Brandy Cream on for the trim, Dellwood Sand for the accent (the piece of wood that runs below the roof) and a pop of Tarrytown Green for the front door.  I like that this selection updates the home while simultaneously blending with the preexisting brick.  One of the major problems with the house right now is that the trim is just way too dark brown.  Lightening it up and letting the front door provide the contrast will clean up the look lickety-split.  

Next.

Another option for Jason that doesn’t involve the laborious task of painting the brick: a nice light trim in Cloud White, an accent in Sag Harbor Gray and a Cromwell Gray Door.  I like that sanders kept the door fairly neutral with this combo, letting the cloud white do the talking.  The white would really pop against the brick, but in a really fantastic way, unlike what the brown is doing now.

If Jason decides to paint the brick, which I 10000% support, here is an option for him:  Body paint in Louisburg Green, trim & accent in Hazy Skies and a door in Duxbury Gray.  Who can go wrong with Gray and Green with a nice, light accent?  I think this palette will modernize the home without conflicting with the ranch style.

I have to admit that I’m a pretty big fan of this option:  Body in Tucson Winds, trim and accent in Ashen Tan and Door in good ole Gray.  I love a light house, I think it would really pop in that gigantic yard.  Like the last option, it’s a nice update without trying too hard.

Finally, we have my favorite option.  Ok, I’m a sucker for gray, with the Granite painted brick you could probably make the trim neon green and hot pink and I’d still love it, but I like what Sanders has chosen even more:  Steam trim and accent with Mysterious for the door.  I think this palette is the most sophisticated and I am BEGGING Jason to please please paint his house this color and send us some pictures.

I tried to find homes online painted similarly but wasn’t able to find the right combination, so instead I did a crappy photoshop mock-up of Jason’s house.  Hopefully my elementary rendering won’t scare him out of the project:

Jason, bear in mind that there will be much more depth in reality, it won’t look like a gray play-doh fortress if given the treatment in real life.  Squint your eyes and look at it (god, I’ve never had to say that about a design project) see, isn’t it grand?

Best of luck, dumb dude!  Be sure to send us pictures when you’re done.

For anyone in Austin who is looking for a walking-talking color encyclopedia be sure to visit Sanders at Hill Country Paint: 5501 South Congress / 78745

Hello, darling readers of Design Crisis!  Your hair looks fantastic today.

For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Tula and I’m usually turning tricks on a blog called WHORANGE.  Like many of you, I rely heavily upon my daily Design Crisis fix to get me out of bed and through the day.  Therefore, when Erin and Karly asked me to be a guest blogger, I felt like an addict being given the keys to the crack house Miss America – honored, delighted, and ready to embark upon a glamour-filled journey.

But, before I launch into the talent portion of the competition, I would like to acknowledge the little fellow who made my debut today possible — Erin’s newborn son.  Welcome to this world, handsome guy.  You’ve got yourself a tremendously talented, witty, and inspiring mom who is admired both internationally and intergalactically.  And that Karly lady she hangs around with ain’t too bad either.

That being said, let’s sparkle, shall we?

Today’s inspiration comes to us from a ditty made famous by my hero — Judy Garland.  Judy was a troubled gal with a million dollar voice and Hollywood at her fingertips.  In other words…she’s just like us. Please sing along if you know the lyrics.

Somewhere over the…

Yep, you got it.

Rainbow Reproduction.  Making rainbows is an arduous task and one that unicorns do not take lightly.  The combination of carnal chemistry and heavenly lighting is key and extremely rare, but the result is pure magic.  Chris Bishop’s educational “Afternoon Delight” is the perfect way to say “I love you” and dispel the myth that rainbows are born of raindrops and sunshine.

Rainbow Kicks.  With the long trek ahead of us, let’s pick out some sensible shoes, shall we?   Salvatore Ferragamo’s colorful collection ranges from practical platforms to fancy flats.  Since comfort is key, I’ll slip on the platforms.

Cue music…

Rainbow Rockers.  As we all know, rainbows and rock stars go together like whiskey and rehab.  Jason Munn of The Small Stakes takes a page from the psychedelic 60s and spins it modern with his vibrant screen prints.  Is anybody else getting the munchies?

Rainbow Cravings.  Remember, you are what you eat.  Therefore, eat pretty.  (Macarons by Paulette.)

Rainbow Poop.  And, poop pretty.

Please, take your time.  No rush.  I’ll just be in the next room reading my favorite novel…

Rainbow Wisdom:  If only I could remember what color it was.  A wise person once said, “Color-sorting your bookshelf may look pretty as a pony, but it’s as practical as a Pinto.”

That wise person was me.  Could have sworn that book was leopard print.  Maybe I’ll find it in here…

Rainbow reading.  The Kid’s Republic Library in Beijing stocks picture books from all over the world and provides plenty of technicolor hideaways and colorful corridors for tiny readers.   However, something tells me the library doesn’t supply these…

Rainbow Rings.  Kiddie coloring meets fabulous finger fashion with Timothy Liles crayon rings.  Speaking of art…

Rainbow Post-Modern.  Yves Klein and Jasper Johns once channeled their inner rainbows with “Yves Peintures” and “0-9″.  I think I’ve found the perfect place to hang them, too…

Rainbow Room.  Designer extraordinaire Gio Ponti knew how to craft a colorful crib and even created the design magazine Domus, which ran from 1928-1999, to show us how.  (Thanks for the tip, Mr. Peacock!)

Rainbow Respite.  These Ferragamos are killing me, people.  One moment please as I rest on this bench.

Rainbow Relaxation.  Speaking of rest, I took a trip to Yosemite over the 4th of July and it looked nothing like this.   Perhaps I should go back in the Fall.   (Illustrations by Scott Hansen.)

Okay, I’m back on my feet.  Let’s hustle…

Rainbow Enlightenment.  Did you know that if you close your eyes and envision two unicorns humping, a rainbow will shoot from your third eye?  It’s true!

Go ahead and try it.  I’ll wait.  (Illustration by Brandi Strickland.)

Rainbow Misfire.  But, keep your third eye trajectory away from the cats!

Illustration by nutandbee

We’ve finally made it — the end of the rainbow!  Thank you for taking this journey with me, lovely denizens of Design Crisis.  Sorry, there isn’t a pot of gold, field of green, or pocket gnome for you to take home.  Sadly, all that’s here is the cold, hard reality of what happens when you indulge too much in a good thing.

Stay pretty, darlings!

tula

You dudes may remember the bedroom makeover I started a hundred million years several months ago.  Well, we were moving right along, then I got busy with work so the project got put to the side for a bit.  I’m ready to wrap it up now but I am at a MAJOR impasse:  I can not decide what to do with the walls.  I have one black wall, which I love, and the rest are white, also great.  So, what’s the problem?  I want to do something to the white walls to make them a bit more interesting and to make my headboard stand out.  Let’s start with a pic of the room now:

Sorry, I’m no Erin so the picture isn’t so great.  The curtains are going to be rehung a few inches higher, art and lighting are still being picked out, and I’m thinking of getting this rug for under the bed:

Yes, we have all seen this Ikea rug before.

I thought doing something simple like this on the walls would be good, but I’m not sure the headboard will stand out enough:

I don’t have to do a laser light show, I could vary the shape:

Or should I do something with subtle black lines to tie in the black wall?

I’m really open to any and all suggestions, even if you want to tell me to paint the whole thing kelly green (which I probably won’t do, but girl, I will listen!)

help!!!!!

I know that the June issues of our shelter mags are old news by now but apparently I’ve been too busy eating bon bons and watching episodes of Ninja Warrior to notice.  My monthly subscriptions arrived weeks ago but I hadn’t even cracked them open until Erin and Ben came over on Saturday night.  Our husbands decided they could best socialize by diving head-first into somecrappyx-boxgame, leaving Erin and I with a stack of design magazines and a bottle of wine.  Since Erin is knocked up, I had the unfortunate task of getting rid of the booze.

Ok, where is this all going?  The bottom line is that we saw this house in Met home and it knocked our socks off.  You’ve probably seen it all by now but, because of the bon bons and ninja warrior, it was new to me (and Erin).  Enjoy:

I love everything except the small dorky painting over the fireplace.  Erin and I have also decided that it’s in my best interest to replicate that little cactus garden in my bay window.

Ok, this picture wasn’t in the magazine, and for good reason, I say.  That big ole rock is good, the 2 smaller pieces of art are ok, but the rest is too craft-corner-kitsch.  

Erin and I decided to divvy up the furniture in this room: she got, what she refers to as the giant tooth, while I took the wood tulip table.  I really wanted the tooth, but she did such a good job naming it I really couldn’t argue.  Neither of us took Marilyn.  Sorry Marilyn.

Erin immediately claimed these lovely green chairs and I have since ordered the pieces necessary to knock off that wicked ball chain lamp.  Do you see how it’s touching the table?  Do you?! 

What I find most lovely about this patio is that the homeowners are probably able to spend time on it.  Right now my UNCOVERED patio is reaching daytime temperatures of what feels like a million bazillion degrees (ok, today was like 100).  With few trees in sight, my porch is currently off limits.  Oh, and the blue and pink here are nice, too.

A pool and an umbrella could quickly shift my backyard from uninhabitable to party-town-usa.  Yes, I would like fringe on my umbrella, too.

We have seen this image before on The Daily Bed, loved it then, love it now, love love love.

Ok, I’m gonna level with ya:  I’m not really sure what’s goin on here but, no matter, I love it.   While the wall looks like it’s covered in magazine clippings I don’t remember my high school bedroom looking nearly as cool when I tried the same budget wallpaper stunt.  

oh goodness, you had me at gold poufs.  

Have I ever told you guys how much I like those colorful plastic outdoor rugs?  Well, I really do.

Our Protagonist, artist Doug Meyer in front of the yellow entry way he whipped up.  

GUESS WHAT Y’ALL?!?  I was just trying to find a link to Doug’s design site when I found a NYT hometour slideshow from 2006.  

Chairs: same.  Deck: now turquoise, no fringy umbrella out by the sun chairs

I don’t even know what this space is now but holy ick, I’m glad he changed it.

Also, you may now visit that knoll sofa in photo #1, it has been recovered in green.

Ok, This room looks like it is now the room in photo #1, the one on the far side of the partition.  Erin, overt your eyes from the chrome ball lamp.  Look!  That chair has now been recovered and it found a friend (see photo #1).  The lamp in the corner is now in the bedroom (see photo #7) The table is in the Marilyn room.  The painting is in the dining room.  They all look so much better in their new homes.

For some reason this reveal feels very juicy gossipy to me.  This is the decor equivalent of Brittany’s car-exit stunts.

One last pic for the road:

The jade green Ondine console ($5,900) and wall piece ($3,900), are part of the Doug & Gene collection.  So, let’s see $9,800.  Yep, seems about right.

Let’s get this straight:  I really do like the house as shown in Met Home, I didn’t mean for this to become a bitchy design-coverup-exposed expose, it was a last minute addition.  Doug, A+ on the home redo, it was much needed.  Can I come swim in your pool?

Today, I’m in a funk. You know those days where, from the very moment you wake up and rub the sleep out of your grubbly little eyes, you just feel whack? Well, I’ve got a major case of the grumble grumbles, and the only things stopping me from throwing a rock through the window are A) the cost of replacing said window and B) the cost of therapy for my anger management problem. Whew! Crisis averted thanks to poverty!

Anyway, I refuse to sit and stew. So it’s up to me to find a happy distraction, and do you know what makes me happy and distracted?

Motherfucking Rainbow Brite, that’s what.

I mean, no one can be angry in the face of all that COLOR. Sure, I like black and white and brown and gray. A lot. But sometimes, I just need to visit a happy fantasy land, where Roy G Biv reigns supreme and the world is filled with sparkles. And hopefully donuts. I bet the guy who owns this renovated Art Deco house has a mountain of sparkly donuts in his rainbow painted cupboard just for me.

This dude does not give a rat’s rump about the oft touted “household color palette.” This is a shameless, unapologetic exploitation of paint, combined with an unadulterated love of the Corbusier, Bertoia and Panton triumvirate.

Did I already mention the animal skins?

But, the magical elevator alone is enough to make me forget all the things I don’t like about this house.

And for all its flaws — or perhaps because of them — I feel that this home is inhabited by a person who likes pastries, rides his bicycle in the house, and plays video games during business hours. Maybe Tom Hanks from Big lives here?

Whatever. It’s a vast improvement over Tom Hanks in Castaway or The Da Vinci Code.

Down here in Texas, I’ve been craving what you northerners have been taking for granted for months:  some snow days.  Last week, the hubs, Matt, my brother, Davis, his friend, Tom and I finally got our fix:  5 days in snowy Vail Colorado.  I got to walk in honest-to-god snow and see my breath when I dared to step outside, it totally ruled.  My trip also inspired this post of all white goodness.  I’ll bore you with some vacay pics first, then we’ll move along to view the stuff you’re here for:  decor porn

Tom, Davis & me about to make our first run of the day.  Note my big mug of chai, which I am rarely seen without.

Me, Matt, and Davis in our exceptionally fancy goggles

I monitor as Matt and Davis scrape 10 inches of overnight snowfall off my aunt’s car

K-dawg in front of the stable where aunt Darlene’s horse lives.  Please keep in mind that I’m wearing, like, 45 pounds worth of snowboarding gear, which hides my teeny tiny 13 inch (approx) waist line.

Ok, no one likes to look at other people’s pictures so I’ll quit the tomfoolery and move on to the meat of the post.

Several Months ago I posted this Nathan Ables print available from Tiny Showcase.  As fate would have it, Mr. Ables contacted the DC headquarters just days after my trip updating us on his newest work:

Nathan’s almost all white print, Two Roofs, merged seamlessly with my plans for an all white post.  Hooray, we’re all winners.  You may buy the limited edition print here

Clockwise from top left:

Bianco Pelle Quadatissimo (aka awesome ottoman) at myfab.com (It killed me not to post the gold version)

Snow Globe available here

DC fave: The Carlos Night Light, available here

Banana Bowl (also available in gold, hooray!) here

Cloud Umbrella from Joons Design

Design House, Muuto is stealing my heart six ways to Sunday with their plethora of oddly shaped white objects

Because I was feeling extra daring, I allowed myself to cruise over to the house of all things overpriced and unattainable, 1stdibs, just to glimpse at their white selection:

I could give you individual links to these items, but really, which of you readers is ready to shell out 25 large for a pair of hand chairs.  If you’ve got that kinda cash here are the options I am willing to present:  1. call your decorator and tell her to get her ass on the case, or the better choice, 2. contact me directly at hollaback@design-crisis.com, I will gladly take some of that extra green off your, um, hands.

If I were ever honestly willing to pay 1st dibs style prices, the only thing I could imagine shelling out serious dough for would be my favorite light ever from innermost.  There is no price mentioned on the site (surprise!) so I’m guessing it exceeds my $100 / light limit.  Yes, I know, I know, I could make it.  But who has time?  Plus, I don’t want it to end up looking like this.

Until now, my white obsession has mostly revolved around lamps, here are a few choice chairs to even things out:

clockwise from top:

Crochet Chair from whack-a-holic, Marcel Wanders

Chair that I can’t find the name of from Mathieu Lehanneur

Tropicalia Chair from Moroso (it’s really best in it’s multi-colored version)

Bouquet Chair also from Moroso (not sure about that stand, though)

Hechima 4 chair via atelier 29

If you’re looking for something lovely and white that is absolutely amazing but has no function what-so-ever, might I suggest this sculpture:

Kim Simonsson has a plethora of to-die-for pieces in her gallery, most of them make me swoon with their mixture of white and gold, but I wanted to stay on task like a good little blogger.

As I can’t afford a single item in my post today, but love clusters of white oddities, I’ve taken to buying toys from the thrift store and spray painting them white.  Here are 2 pieces from my, very slowly growing, collection.  Total cost: $3.75